Academy’s PTSD Chaplain - Academy’s PTSD Chaplain chapter 51

51 – Solemn Kumayeh Ceremony (7)

Priest Camilla opened her eyes.

Strange ceiling, unfamiliar air, unfamiliar sensations.

Everything before her eyes was unfamiliar. Her eyes rolled around.

“…Where is this?”

This all-white place seemed undoubtedly like a hospital. She slowly raised her body from the bed.

“Ugh….”

Priest Camilla frowned. Her body ached all over. It felt like every joint in her body was being pricked with needles.

After massaging her arms and legs for a moment, she fell into deep thought with a serious expression.

What had happened until she was admitted to the hospital? She couldn’t remember anything.

The last memory that came to mind was waking up in the early morning…

“…A clock.”

Suddenly, something entered Priest Camilla’s eyes. She stared blankly at it.

It was a wall clock that could be seen anywhere. In an instant, Priest Camilla was captivated by an indescribable terror.

She covered her ears and tightly shut her eyes.

‘Please… Please…’

The ticking sound of the clock. The sound of the clock hands moving. She was afraid to hear that sound. No, it felt like she would go insane.

“…….”

Despite Priest Camilla’s worries, nothing could be heard except for the muffled sound of her covering her ears.

Priest Camilla opened her eyes cautiously. The white hospital room revealed itself again.

The sounds that seemed to drive her crazy no longer echoed. The only thing inside the hospital room was a serene stillness.

Priest Camilla, finding it incredibly reassuring.

“Ha, Haha….”

She relaxed the tension in her body. Like a doll with cut strings, her body leaned onto the bed.

“Sigh…. S…”

Priest Camilla, since coming to the Chaldea Royal Academy, could finally fall into the most comfortable sleep.

* * * * *

Deng— Deng—.

The bell filled the classroom. It was the bell signaling the end of the class.

“Today’s class will end here.”

I carefully gathered the textbooks I had brought for the class. Carrying a bag filled with various theological books and the Bible, I stepped out of the classroom with a comfortable stride.

It was the bag Sofia gave me as a gift. Despite my initial refusal, she forcefully embraced me with the bag, claiming it was a gift she had bought with her first paycheck.

The day we talked with Father Matteo, during our walk, Sofia hurriedly returned to the professor’s office for the reason of preparing a surprise gift for me.

“Father, thank you for your hard work today.”

Sofia approached me. I nodded and opened my mouth to respond.

“Sofia, you’ve worked hard as well.”

“Today’s class had a good response, right? While maintaining the secrecy of the Kuma ceremony, the essential aspects of demonology were not blurred.”

“Is that so?”

“The students also responded well. Recently, the reputation of Father at the academy has been skyrocketing, haven’t you heard?”

“It’s an exaggeration.”

While exchanging various conversations, we walked towards the cafeteria. Sofia, who had been sticking close to my side and chatting, suddenly remembered something and spoke excitedly.

“Oh, right! By the way, there was a call from the Earth Hospital.”

“… Has he awakened?”

Sofia nodded. I stopped my steps towards the cafeteria.

“When did he wake up?”

“Well… just yesterday, he regained consciousness.”

“…”

“Why are you like that?”

Sofia looked puzzled. I stared at her for a moment, then gestured as if it was nothing.

“I’m thinking of visiting him to offer my condolences.”

Sofia’s expression showed surprise. Her reaction was somewhat questionable.

“Why are you making that face?”

“If it’s Father, I didn’t think you would go for a condolence visit.”

“What kind of person do you think I am?”

“A cold and narrow-minded person to everyone?”

“…”

I quickly moved my paused steps, not considering Sofia’s shorter stride this time, and walked forward without looking back.

“Wait a minute! Cancel! I’ll cancel it!”

“Who are you? Do you happen to know me?”

“Seriously…! You come out like this? Please adjust your pace!”

“I’m narrow-minded, so I don’t know how to be considerate.”

“I’m sorry! I’m really sorry, please!”

I felt the gaze of other students. I continued walking without caring.

This wasn’t my immaturity; it was Sofia’s subtlety within daily life that I hadn’t noticed. Thinking like that, in a moment when I coldly tried to shake off the following Sofia.

“…What are you two doing?”

Professor Esther looked at me with puzzled eyes.

I subtly narrowed my stride. Sofia, who caught up with me in no time, grabbed my sleeve, panting heavily.

“Heh…! Hek…! Using such childish methods…!”

“Nothing happened. Let’s go for a meal.”

Professor Esther’s gaze was slightly sharp.

* * * * *

“Sister Camila, good morning.”

The nurse greeted with a bright smile. Sister Camila didn’t respond.

“……”

Watching Sister Camila stare blankly into space, the nurse bit her lip.

Since Sister Camila regained consciousness, she avoided talking to others. The doctors and nurses in the hospital were the same.

The only exception was Priest Pedro, who had also regained consciousness.

After asking for some time alone to talk with Priest Pedro.

That’s when it started. Sister Camila stopped talking.

“Sister Camila, today some people want to visit for well-wishing. How…”

“……”

Well-wishing? Were there people who wanted to visit her at the Chaldea Royal Academy?

At least, according to Sister Camila’s memory, there were none. Sister Camila looked at the nurse with a skeptical expression. Her dry lips twitched.

“Who.”

“What?”

“Who came.”

“Well, two people came. The head priest and the sub-priest of the academy.”

Sister Camila’s pupils shook slightly. The nurse couldn’t catch that, but she could tell that Sister Camila was somewhat disturbed.

“How should I handle this…?”

“….”

Priest Camila bit her lip, wearing an expression that seemed to reflect deep contemplation. After a moment, she slowly turned her head. As always, her gaze was directed towards the window near the bed.

“Please let them in.”

“Understood. Who would you like to meet first?”

“Can’t both of them come in?”

“If it becomes noisy, it could disturb other patients, so only one person at a time can come in.”

Reluctantly, Priest Camila nodded. Then, she called out the name of Priest Sophia.

“Please bring in Priest Sophia first.”

The nurse acknowledged and left the room. In the now silent ward, Priest Camila silently gazed out the window.

Unlike the view of the academy outside the window, Priest Camila’s mind was in disarray.

Father Lucio Antonelli. He was someone Priest Camila didn’t want to meet yet. It wasn’t just because of the offensive remarks he had made to her.

– Father Antonelli personally conducted the exorcism ceremony.

The words uttered weakly by Father Pedro lingered in her mind, refusing to leave.

If they were to meet, what should she say?

Express gratitude? Or apologize for past mistakes?

Simply thinking about it didn’t make Priest Camila’s mind any less confused. There was another aspect that troubled her.

She was ashamed to look at Father Antonelli’s face. That was the biggest reason her mind was in turmoil.

A priest dispatched from the Vatican fell victim to demons. Moreover, priests who came to exorcise those demons.

It was a pitiful sight beyond imagination. She herself seemed utterly useless.

“Priest Camila.”

Suddenly, a clear and sweet voice tickled Priest Camila’s ears. She slowly turned her head.

“Sophia, do you remember me?”

“…Priest Sophia.”

“Hehe, you remember.”

“Please sit down.”

“Oh, no. I’ll be leaving soon.”

Just like when they first met, she still wore a cheerful smile. Priest Camila deliberately avoided looking at her face.

According to Father Pedro, Sophia also participated in the exorcism ceremony.

“I’m sorry.”

“네?”

“Sorry for showing such a pitiful sight. It’s something I should have done originally…”

He had just graduated from the seminary academy and had not been in the assistant position for long. He was even younger than Sister Camilla.

The Kumaya ceremony was by no means an easy task. He must have seen many unpleasant things, things he didn’t want to see. Sister Camilla couldn’t bear the guilt of passing such a difficult task onto someone so lively and energetic.

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As if she could read Sister Camilla’s mind, Assistant Sofia, who had been staring at her for a moment, spoke up.

“…I’m okay.”

“It wasn’t too hard, was it?”

“Well… if I said it wasn’t hard, that would be a lie, right?”

Sofia, with a bright smile. Sister Camilla bit her lip.

“Still… I was okay. I’m fine now, and I’ll be fine in the future.”

“That’s…”

“Sister Camilla.”

Sofia looked at Sister Camilla with firm, upright eyes. Sister Camilla could only stare at those eyes, as if she had seen them somewhere before.

“Please thank Head Priest more than me.”

“…What do you mean?”

“The person who suffered the most was Head Priest.”

Sofia’s expression looked somewhat bitter. Sister Camilla didn’t ask for the reason.

“Well, I’ll be going now. I’ll pray for your speedy recovery.”

Just as she did when she came in, Sofia quickly hid her expression.

After Sofia left, Sister Camilla pulled the blanket over her head.

The person who would come in next was probably…

“Head Priest Antonelli…”

Right now, he was the last person she wanted to meet. He had suffered the most during the Kumaya ceremony. Sofia had clearly said that.

Drrrr…

The sound of the door opening. Sister Camilla’s body trembled slightly.

Thud. Thud.

She heard the sound of firm footsteps. As the footsteps got closer, Sister Camilla swallowed her dry saliva.

She desperately wished she could pretend to be asleep and leave the room.

Rustle. Sigh.

Her mood was colorless, but she heard the sound of someone sitting on the chair next to the bed.

“Father Camilla.”

A familiar voice echoed. Father Camilla pulled down the covers.

“… Father Antonelli.”

It was Father Antonelli. As usual, with indifferent eyes, his gaze pierced her like a needle.

“How are you feeling?”

Father Antonelli asked casually. Father Camilla struggled to control her trembling voice and answered.

“I-I’m alright. A bit disoriented, but…”

“That’s a relief.”

“Yes…”

An awkward silence followed. Father Camilla felt an overwhelming urge to escape from the hospital room.

Taking a deep breath, she mustered up the courage to speak.

“F-Father… Antonelli.”

“Yes.”

“I’m sorry…”

Upon hearing Father Camilla’s apology, he twitched his eyebrows for a moment.

“It’s alright.”

In a truly nonchalant manner, he replied. It was still an indifferent response.

Father Camilla thought he didn’t accept her apology. Just as she was about to offer another apology, her mouth opened for a moment.

“I have some news to share.”

Father Antonelli interrupted her. Her hesitant mouth closed immediately.

“The Holy See sent an official letter.”

“The Holy See…?”

Father Antonelli nodded. Father Camilla lowered her head deeply.

She was afraid of what disciplinary action would be imposed. Perhaps she had caused a scandal. Her eyes grew damp.

In front of her, a letter from the Holy See was presented, sent directly by them.

“Please read it. It would be faster than explaining verbally.”

“….”

Father Camilla blankly began reading the letter. It contained unbelievable content.

Father Camilla and Father Pedro. Despite the failure of their wedding ceremony and the incident at the abbey, this information must be kept strictly confidential.

And the phrase written at the very end.

– Silence is golden, and a sacred tongue is the blessing of the Lord.

Father Camilla, who belonged to the Holy See, could not miss the meaning of this sentence. Father Camilla looked at Father Antonelli with a bewildered expression.

“This, this is…”

“Is there something strange about it?”

“Here… this phrase…”

“…Ah.”

His face contorted with bitterness, and quickly returned to an expressionless state.

“It’s nothing.”

“…How can this be nothing?”

“It’s a decision of the Holy See. Don’t question it.”

Father Antonelli snatched the official document from Father Camilla’s hand. Father Camilla stared at him blankly.

Her mind was filled with one question.

‘…Why?’

She had organized the Buddhist mourning ceremony for herself, visited the hospital, and even successfully completed the ceremony, but she did not receive any reward. However, Father Antonelli seemed unaffected.

Father Camilla couldn’t understand it.

In fact, it was common sense to eliminate evil. Was it really possible for a priest who knew how to conduct the funeral ceremony to pretend not to notice it while the demon wandered around the academy? It was an impossible thing.

However, Father Camilla had some sense of shame. She herself did not forget the question she had casually thrown at Father Antonelli.

– Why didn’t you do anything when Sister Helena was dying in front of you, Father Antonelli?

Snap—

Unknowingly, her hand tightened. The sheets on the hospital bed that she held in her grasp crumpled unattractively.

“Why… why…”

Why was he sacrificing himself like this for Father Camilla and Father Pietro? She was curious about it.

“Why are you going to such lengths?”

Father Antonelli looked at her. His expression seemed slightly surprised.

Father Camilla herself was also surprised. However, her mouth began to act on its own, beyond her control.

“Why… why are you going to such lengths? I even said harsh things to you, Father… what will be left for you after going to such lengths for me?”

“….”

His lips twitched. The eyes that looked at Father Camilla were not the indifferent ones she was used to seeing.

“…That.”

It contained various emotions: regret, remorse, sadness, relief… all condensed into one emotion.

“I don’t really know either.”

“What—”

“For the sake of others, the reason to do things that don’t necessarily have to be done.”

Why sacrifice so much for others? What is the reason for taking on tasks that don’t need to be done, going out of one’s way to do them?

“…I, too, still don’t understand.”

Father Antonelli’s gaze, as he spoke, was fixed far beyond the window.

Sister Camilla couldn’t respond.

Just like her, she could do nothing but stare blankly out the window.

That was all.