Became an Academy Spearman - Chapter 774
774. [Western Front] – Resolution (50)
***
dump.
As soon as I returned to the inner room, I lost strength and collapsed on the bed.
“What on earth does it mean to live?”
I lay down on my bed, mumbling something stupid that I thought was stupid. Even though I returned from my mission, it was barely afternoon.
Even as I looked at the ceiling brightly lit by sunlight, my mind felt a little dazed.
I definitely didn’t try to look at it. But even if I wasn’t conscious of it, my eyes kept heading there. Seeing others getting seriously injured or approaching death.
And that’s it now. It wasn’t anything special or terribly surprising.
“… … .”
As I took a moment to catch my breath, I was getting used to it. I am not very surprised when I see someone get hurt or die.
Due to the aftermath of using the skill, a strain was being placed on my body.
There was a very different difference between simply manifesting power from nowhere and using power on a dangerous front called the red zone.
Normally, my body shouldn’t get tired just because I use this level of skill, but a little fatigue was taking over my entire body.
I know this is fatigue that will go away soon, but it seemed to be affecting my mind for no reason.
‘Everyone is working hard in their respective positions.’
Officers as officers, soldiers as soldiers.
And each of them had a variety of reasons for standing on the front lines, including numerous reasons and personal beliefs.
In my case, I want to elevate myself even more, and there are also reasons why I have no choice but to do it given the circumstances.
But when I saw someone dying, there was nothing strange about it.
Sreuk!
He raised his hand and squeezed it tightly, but took a short breath.
“I know how ridiculous peace is in this world.”
For some reason, I find myself wishing for such an ideal these days.
I hope that no one gets seriously hurt or dies.
I know how idealistic that is as long as there is a threat called an apostle, but I have suddenly come to feel that way.
I live well alone.
A life where I live well only with people related to me… … .
It wasn’t the life I had hoped for in the past, but now I was looking at it more broadly.
And I couldn’t really tell whether it was because of Shinchang Eustea’s will or not.
“He is a hero who tried to save countless people… … .”
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Even as I said it, it didn’t have the slightest bit of reality to me.
In the many old books I looked at before coming to the front, all of them mentioned Sinchang Eustea as a ‘hero of national salvation.’ He sacrificed himself to save countless others.
The apostle of the beginning was an unlucky hero who saved the empire against an unknown threat in that era.
And that power resides in me now.
In my will, in my hand, in my spear.
Whatever he said, I knew I was under his influence.
“… … .”
I exhaled calmly and collected my thoughts.
‘But it’s still different.’
But I didn’t think that my values were formed entirely because of Eustea. The strong will of Eustea, who extremely denied and loathed the apostle.
Even though I was influenced by his will, I tried to build a good relationship with Azazel.
I can say without a doubt that it was my will. The annihilation of the apostles desired by Eustea. It is my will other than the great hatred that did not even try to leave a single apostle in this world and that tried to burn the world.
And I pushed through my will and overcame the extreme rejection my body showed.
But now, will I try to adapt to Eustea’s influence because my values and direction of life have changed?
“No.”
He nodded while speaking.
Because my will is the same as Eustea’s will.
So, my heart was fluctuating in this strange way right now. If I had denied Eustea’s will and only wished for my own life, I would have had to grapple with the strange feeling of resistance alone again.
Because I will have to force myself to go against the will left behind by Eustea and enforce my will again.
Sreuk.
I slowly raised my upper body and let out a laugh. In the midst of my brief worries, my heart straightened out. which… … As I thought about my heart, something felt very strange.
“If this was hypocrisy, it would have been easier.”
If I was trying to serve someone with false goodness and my heart was this uncomfortable, I would have just let go of it. Without even thinking about it further, I probably just wanted to do it for myself.
But that wasn’t it.
Because I know where my true heart is heading. There was nothing to worry about.
Whatever your heart desires.
And if you thought it was right, there was nothing to worry about.
“… … “Let’s say it properly.”
***
dripping.
At the sound of a knock on the office, Leria pressed her throbbing temple and opened her mouth.
“… … who is this.”
Lately, I don’t have time to breathe every day. So, not only did I have no peace of mind, but my body was also unable to rest properly.
ㅡThis is Han Cheon-seong. Could we talk for a moment?
But at the unexpected visitor, Leria blinked for a moment.
‘At this time?’
Recently, I heard that he is adapting to the enemy better than I thought and is performing his duties with outstanding performance. Still, I didn’t lose interest, but it felt like a very sudden visit.
“Come in.”
Han Cheon-seong opens the door and comes in with permission.
I first stood up while looking at that figure.
“Please sit comfortably.”
“yes.”
Even now, almost two weeks later, Han Tiansheng has not changed much from the beginning.
Be polite and formal. However, a small amount of composure stood out in his actions. I noticed that my body was no longer rigid, and I also took a seat across from him.
“First of all, thank you so much for taking the time to do this.”
“That’s enough of manners. So what’s going on? “You must be pretty tired after returning from mission a little while ago.”
“It’s because I have something to say personally.”
“What is it?”
As I was answering, all kinds of thoughts came to mind.
‘Is it a little difficult?’
No matter how calm they appear on the outside and their outstanding performance, their feelings may be different. So, he could come to me and tell me that he was adjusting his mission, or that he had changed his mind since the first time.
Because people are inherently fickle.
As I was thinking about that, I was contemplating how to answer.
“I think this is a bit of a presumptuous request. Let me be honest. “Is it possible for me to volunteer for another unit’s mission?”
Tuk. At the words that followed, I blinked for a moment without realizing it. That wasn’t anything I thought it would say.
It was something I didn’t even expect, so I felt like my head was floating. For a moment, I even had the feeling that my thoughts could not keep up with those words.
“now… … “What did you say?”
“He said he wanted to volunteer for another unit.”
In response to my unwavering response, I gently pinched my thigh without realizing it.
It was so natural that I felt pain. Without a doubt, this moment was real. Even though I knew better that it wasn’t just a momentary dream, I decided to check it out.
Because Han Tiansheng is saying such absurd things.
“… … You should take a break now. “When I heard Roxanna’s mission report, she said she even used her skills today, but now she’s saying that to me?”
“yes. “Yes.”
“It’s not that it’s true, but do you know what you’re saying?”
It was so absurd that it gave me a headache.
What kind of strange noise is this?
Kuuk.
The car was frowning and gently pressing its forehead. Han Tiansheng, who caught my eye, was carefully opening his lips.
“Actually, there is one thing I have not reported to Lieutenant Leria.”
“… … report? “What do you mean by that?”
“It’s about my body.”
Calm.
And without the slightest hesitation. He completely solidified his thoughts and began speaking as if he had come to visit me, but on the other hand, my mind was so full of my previous worries that it was almost laughable.
“ha… … My head hurts so much right now, and there are more than one or two things to worry about, and there are so many things I have to do in yellow mode. Right now, I have to go on a mission tomorrow… … So, I’ll just pretend I didn’t hear this story at all. “Let’s stop here?”
So, inadvertently, I offered a compromise.
Let’s just pretend it never happened, let’s not talk any more… … .
‘please. Just accept it.’
Other than what happened to Han Tiansheng’s body, I would have listened to anything that was bad. But looking at Han Cheon-seong talking now, it seemed obvious that he was probably going to say something like his body was strong or he was fine.
“I want you to listen to me properly about my body. Lieutenant Leria… … .”
But my wish was just a wish.
“… … .”
Looking at Han Cheon-seong, who was looking at me with perfectly upright eyes, I could not bring myself to give an order to congratulate the guest or forcibly break off the conversation.
‘What the hell is he?’
They are often very talented. He is an outstanding genius like Major Anastasia, etc.
I’ve felt that type of emotion countless times over the past two weeks, and I’ve been surprised every time. However, he was now astonished in a slightly different sense.
It was different.
There was something separate about the person named Han Cheon-seong, to the point where he felt like he was a completely different species.
“… … say it.”
“To tell the truth, I am very cautious. It is not yet known to the public, and I have repeatedly been warned by the Magic Tower Lord not to tell anyone else. Nevertheless, I would like to tell you.”
What on earth are you trying to say that you’re taking such a long time to say?
“… … .”
As I inadvertently made eye contact with Han Tiansheng, I became nervous without realizing it.
‘I don’t think it means anything negative, but could it be that he had a chronic illness or something?’
ㅡSpecial constitution.
It was a more common story than you might think.
Even among those born with great talent, there are those who are born with strangely unfortunate physical defects or chronic diseases that the average person has never even heard of.
It was as if they were jealous of their talents and were subjected to trials.
Gulp.
Amidst my hesitation, I somehow managed to pull myself together. Perhaps, Han Tiansheng was trying to say something more serious than I thought.
“You probably have information about me, but you probably don’t know the details of how I was released from the Apostle’s seal.”
“That’s right. He was released from the apostle’s seal with the help of the Magic Tower Lord. “Because the materials contained only that kind of information.”
“But the process is very different.”
Seeing Han Cheon-seong speaking calmly, my heart seemed to freeze cold for a moment.
‘Are there any aftereffects?’
I have looked at the materials related to Han Cheon-seong several times in the past. And in the data about the apostle being sealed, I heard that Han Cheon-seong suddenly turned into a black sphere.
It was an extremely unique type of seal that had no precedent in history.
And with such a special seal, it was not surprising if there were huge aftereffects.
“My body has not returned to the way it was before it was sealed by the Apostle.”
“You didn’t come back… … .”
After hearing the words that followed, I unconsciously took a look at Han Cheon-seong’s appearance.
The most impressive thing was her pale, white skin, and her distinct facial features were unusual to anyone who saw her. Besides that, his strong body was created through rigorous training.
‘What on earth are you trying to say?’
It was a moment that made me even more nervous.
“I can tell you that I am a newly created ‘body.’”