Became an American Retro Novelist - Chapter 188



Only Noblemtl

188.

craving.

The feeling a person has when he or she feels a lack of something and then wants it.

When I looked at the field of genre through the topic of desire, the puzzle that had been intricately fragmented in my head seemed to fall into place.

I also somewhat understood what God said, “Genre is not about people reading what you write.”

Inside a room in the girls’ dormitory.

After returning from dinner, Rebecca Wong sat at her desk and thought about her thoughts.

‘Genre is a writing that expresses people’s desires.’

Based on that hypothesis, she reread ‘The Love of the Vampire Count’ that Kate had recommended to her last time. Then, many parts of it made sense.

The relationship between the count and the maid, and the emotions the readers feel from it.

When the desire expressed in the novel was ‘calculated’, I felt happy as if surging waves were rushing in before my eyes.

‘This was it!’

Rebecca smiled brightly.

Art deals with something that cannot be calculated: human emotions.

But in order to understand it in reverse, thorough calculations were required.

She holds a fountain pen and smiles brightly, organizing her own logic on which parts of ‘The Love of the Vampire Count’ fulfill which desires of the readers.

As the night deepened, chaos was in full swing on the first floor of the girls’ dormitory.

“it’s crazy-!”

“Tony!”

Stanford dorm girls who were already drunk before they could finish a can of beer.

The small CRT television was showing the first episode of ‘About T: TV series’.

The main story, which was a bit longer than the pilot episode, focuses on emotional lines and visual beauty.

Stanford students watched in rapture as the scene they had only imagined unfolded before their eyes, their hearts racing.

Tony and Alice’s first meeting.

Two people having an awkward but sweet conversation.

Crossing gazes, various characters appearing on colorful screens.

A cross-section of school days that is familiar to everyone.

Looking at it, Kate Moore thought.

‘Desire?’

I felt like I had discovered the secret behind a magician’s performance.

Plus, I couldn’t concentrate at all when I saw my high school classmate, Alexa Flair, in the drama.

She borrowed a book from Alice and left with a word of thanks, but soon reappeared on the screen and tilted her head at the sight of Tony and Alice walking affectionately, reciting her lines.

[Those two people together······?]

A greater proportion compared to the pilot episode.

She wore big glasses, pigtails, and a tacky sweater, but it didn’t hide her stunning looks. Alexa was definitely Alexa.

If she hadn’t been her high school classmate, Kate would have watched the drama, lost in thought and growing fantasies about her appearance.

‘craving.’

Kate continues to watch the drama while thinking of those words in her calm mind.

“······.”

“······.”

“······.”

Before she knew it, the screams around her had stopped, and she too was beginning to become absorbed in the visual beauty that only a drama can provide.

[Hey, are you here?]

[That’s the direction the map is pointing. Should we go?]

[are you okay?]

[Well, if it doesn’t seem to be the case, you can just look for it again.]

Tony and Alice headed to the place written on the first ‘Treasure Map’.

Immediately after, the broadcast went into a brief commercial break.

[Chevrolet Corvette-!]

Kwaaaa-! Kwaaaa-!

[Experience whatever you want!]

A random car commercial came on, but no one paid any attention.

“it’s crazy.”

“Really, what’s so funny about this?”

“What was the name of the actor who played Tony?”

Kate finally came to her senses, and as she sat on the floor, she felt that her butt was a little sore.

So, as she was trying to sit up straight and apply strength with her hands, someone came crawling up next to her.

And then he whispered softly.

“Kate.”

“huh······?”

When I turned around at the call, there was Rebecca Wong, who gave off a dangerous vibe for some reason.

“I finally get it.”

“What, what?”

“The Secret of the Romance Genre.”

Two people whispering to each other.

Rebecca wiggled her buttocks slightly like a feline that is about to snatch up its prey. Kate, who was rolling her eyes like a Thomson’s gazelle that was looking around to see if she should run away or not in an unknown sense of danger, eventually asked back in a cautious voice.

“What secret?”

And then I realized through Rebecca’s words.

I should have just run away.

“It’s lust.”

“?”

“huh?”

“······?”

“uh?”

In an instant, all eyes around me were focused on it as if it were a cartoon.

‘Sexual desire’.

He said it exactly as it was said, without a single mistake.

“Both the currently airing ‘About T’ and the ‘Love of the Vampire Count’ that you recommended can ultimately be interpreted as a desire called ‘sexual desire’. Romance is a description of the process in which a man and a woman feel sexual desire for each other. If we talk about why the obvious word ‘love’ was not used, the concept of love······.”

“Now, wait a minute.”

Kate Moore struggled to keep her mask on as it was about to fall off.

She was a being who was more conscious of the gaze of those around her than anyone else, and even if she tried to relieve that feeling, it wouldn’t be possible overnight.

As a result, I had to force a smile and desperately try to persuade Rebecca to stop.

“Uh, should we talk about this separately after that is over?”

“Huh? What’s over?”

Just then, the broadcast started again.

All the girls focused on Tony’s face as it reappeared.

Rebecca, seeing the sight, exclaimed in a louder voice her own realization.

“Look, everyone is horny for Tony.”

Kate Moore’s mask is about to come off again!

***

The next morning.

Why did Kate Moore come to my dormitory to find me?

“Hey! What the heck, God! Are you starting a relationship?”

“Do your best!”

“She’s quite pretty!”

“······That’s not it.”

I dragged Kate out, leaving behind the teasing of a few dorm boys whose faces had become familiar over the past hour. The smile on her face was beginning to crack, as if she herself had found it hard to just ignore the words.

Crackle, crackle.

I glanced at it and asked.

“Isn’t it hard to live like that?”

“Even if it’s difficult, I have to accept it, right?”

“I didn’t use ‘Country of losers’ in that sense.”

“Ha, ha. It’s okay. There’s nothing harder than being misunderstood as dating you.”

“If you hate me more, then don’t come.”

“You couldn’t help it? Something terrible happened yesterday.”

“What’s going on?”

“······Do something about Rebecca Wong.”

“what?”

Kate explained what happened in the dorm yesterday in front of me, who was tilting her head.

······Ah, it was truly a masterpiece.

Rebecca, who never cared about what others thought when it came to literature, drew the glares of those around her when she described Tony as an object of her sexual desire, and Kate, who also received attention as her conversation partner, said she thought she would die from embarrassment.

As I listened to that story, I found myself applauding Rebecca Wong.

Well done, disciple. You gave Kate a hard time.

“I don’t think there’s anything I can do.”

“That interpretation! Correct the interpretation of sexual desire!”

“I don’t think there’s anything particularly wrong.”

“Eww-!!”

“Calm down, Kate. There’s someone coming.”

“Ho, hoho······.”

“Right. Calm down.”

“······What kind of wild beast are you handling?”

“In some ways, it’s harder than a beast.”

He was the type who wanted to compare himself to an animal, but couldn’t find an example.

Because of its dual nature, its outside and inside are different, if you compare it to something on the outside, it is disgusting, and if you compare it to something on the inside, it is nothing but a vicious remark.

“So, that interpretation was not wrong?”

“That’s right. Love is a function of hormones, and sexual desire is also······ Anyway, I think it’s a rough but definitely close to the correct interpretation.”

“No! Don’t talk like that about my Tony and Alice!”

“······.”

“Cancel it right now! Those two are truly in love!”

Wow, that’s something the author of that piece would really be happy to hear.

An author who has fans like this must be really happy.

“It’s all your fault! Because you said things like desire and such yesterday······!”

“Why are you doing this?”

“I now know why I watch this ‘About T’!”

“What is it?”

“Love! Because I want to love!”

“Pick someone. Should I introduce you?”

“······Ah. Absolutely not. Love is just a useless waste of time.”

Kate’s expression softened for a moment and she pushed up her glasses.

······Scary kid. It gives me goosebumps.

“Just watch ‘About T’. It’s really the best.”

Somehow the scalp looks like it’s overlapping with the guy’s.

I hesitated for a moment in front of Kate, who had entered nerd mode(?), and then came up with this answer.

“I guess you have no choice but to take control.”

“You’re holding it together?”

“So you’re saying that you’re the editor?”

“······Me? This is the first time I’ve heard of this?”

“When I introduced you, I said you were a friend who was good at romance. And I also introduced you to a novel that might be an inspiration to Kate. I think you liked her novels and….”

“at all.”

“I feel like things can get better.”

“Absolutely not in this life.”

“······Don’t ever say that in front of Rebecca. This time, you might get hit by a car.”

“You got hit by a car? Who? Why?”

“There is something like that.”

I laughed bitterly as I recalled her bumping into a telephone pole after hearing Kate’s review.

Anyway, Kate seemed completely unaware of it herself, but she was acting as an editor in this club(?). An editor who gave opinions that were infinitely close to ordinary people. That type of person was surprisingly helpful to novice genre writers, because she gave opinions as raw as possible.

“Ha, I don’t know. I don’t really want to show myself like this in front of him.”

“Then we have no choice but to continue on like this. Rebecca, even during class, if there’s something she’s interested in, she’s the type to just rush into it without thinking about her surroundings. I think she’s going to have a hard time in the future.”

“I won’t go to the next meeting.”

“Rebecca must have already chosen you.”

“······Ugh. I’m an idiot for consulting you.”

Kate turns around, grumbling.

As I watched his back as he walked away sadly, I shouted with a voice mixed with laughter.

“Hey, Kate.”

“what.”

“This is fun for you too.”

“······.”

“Let’s do our best together.”

Kate, who had been glancing around, turned around and stopped at me.

I also stopped doing the same thing.

***

We met in the cafeteria twice a week, roughly once every three days.

Each time, Rebecca and John wrote a novel, John continued writing the sequel to ‘The Warrior’s Way’ and Rebecca continued writing new works.

As the meetings continued like that, there were more and more days when the mask on Kate’s face started to crack.

The fourth day we met.

“Why on earth do you always write about sex?”

Rebecca said with a serious face at Kate’s reddened remark.

“I’m a beginner in the genre. Beginners have to start raw.”

“This is going too far. Are stories that are just before the main characters start a relationship considered good in terms of genre?”

“Because the reader desires it? Didn’t you get excited after reading it?”

Suddenly the conversation is about to get more heated.

“······.”

I tried to ignore it and looked back at John.

The romance editorial department(?) was talking their way, and our sword and sorcery editorial department(?) was talking our way.

“······Yes, John.”

“Yeah! I did everything you told me to fix last time!”

But this was a problem in its own right.

“Well, you’ve done well.”

“It’s an honor!”

Giraffe, John Smith, a freshman creative writing major at Stanford University.

He looked at me with those big, innocent, giraffe-like eyes.

“What should we do now?”

“Well, keep using it······?”

“Keep writing. What I mean is, the main character hasn’t finished taking the test in the royal capital yet, so you’re saying that we should talk about this content and start revising it after the current development is over?”

“uh······.”

“As expected, he is a god!”

Mr. John Smith, who is exaggerating things at will.

I know that you consider me a fan and an object of admiration, but now it has gone too far and is becoming too burdensome. I am worried that if this continues, your fandom will develop into something extreme.

This was a bad attitude in its own right.

An author’s writing must necessarily have its own philosophy.

A good genre novel doesn’t just fulfill desires. It has to know how to recommend it to people who aren’t interested or don’t know much about it, saying, “Try this too.”

The first time I read ‘The Warrior’s Way’, it was clear that such a power existed in the novel.

But as John inevitably found himself at crossroads while writing, he increasingly relied on my feedback, and as a result, the novel began to lose its unique character.

Good writing will never be produced if the writer is only influenced by the editor.

As I happen to be in the role of editor for this group, I couldn’t help but think a lot about the current situation.

At the same time, it made me look back on how I was.

‘When I was a rookie in my previous life, I also tried to force myself to meet the editorial department’s demands like this.’

Suddenly, I had a thought that these guys resembled me a lot in my past life.

I, too, once thought that pure literature was superior to genre literature in terms of value, like Rebecca Wong, and tried to forcefully inject the colors of pure literature into my genre novels. And like John Smith recently, there were times when I was swayed only by other people’s opinions and lost my own color.

‘Haha, that was the case back then.’ Now I can laugh it off.

‘As someone with experience, I don’t want to make others walk the same path.’

Rebecca is so self-centered.

John is trying too hard to kill his own color.

This was the thought that kept coming to my mind during the nearly two-hour long review session.

But I thought that if I, as a ‘writer’, pointed out these two people more directly, it would have the opposite effect.

In fact, John Smith started to lose his own color and wander as he listened to my ideas and feedback and went through several reviews.

‘Is there anyone out there who can really help these two······.’

Simon or Julia?

······No, both of them are professionals.

Of course I would help if I asked, but I felt that it would be rude to ask someone who has honed his skills for help without giving them a proper reward.

These two people haven’t grown enough to be able to arrange for publication.

So who would it be?

I am good at genre fiction.

Someone who can give you advice that will be helpful as a ‘reader’.

‘Who is there?’

As I was walking along, thinking deeply, I suddenly stopped in my tracks as if frozen.

ah.

It came to mind.