Black-Haired Internal Revenue Service SWAT Agent - Chapter 343



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Side Story 49: Farewell to Weapons

We flew out of the Colombian jungle in a seaplane piloted by Preston, then refueled on a large barge waiting at sea.

Then, we flew to a joint CIA and JSOC (Joint Special Operations Command, which commands Tier 1 forces) forward base built off the coast of Panama.

It took two full days to hand Trevor Miller over to the evil spy bastards waiting for us there, and to fly to Chicago via the Guantanamo Bay base in Cuba on a US military transport plane.

Unlike our men who played poker with bandages wrapped around their faces, arms, and necks, I slept all day on the plane.

Every time I changed planes or landed at a US military base for refueling, I would open my eyes for a moment and it felt like I had been dreaming.

But all the memories were too vivid to be dismissed as a dream.

The fishy smell that persisted for days on end in the Santa Rita River.

The endless frontino jungle area, just like the jungle in my father’s favorite movie, ‘Apocalypse Now’.

Hector’s friends (parrots) and monkeys seen in the jungle.

And also, the anaconda was much longer and bigger than my Mustang, which is now a fake Bumblebee.

I also remembered when grenades flew in like rocks at our position where we had taken cover with Sergeant Miller and exploded one after another.

Wooden pillars falling all around, amid the smell of gunpowder and mud.

When that thought occurred to me, I flinched without realizing it.

The highlight of the process of going back in time is when Decker, Rooker, and Strauss are pinned down by the cartel mercenaries’ machine gun fire, making it impossible to even see them.

When I had the absurd thought that I was the only one left in this world unharmed, without even being able to confirm whether they were alive or dead.

Just then, overhead, an MQ-9 Reaper was nagging us to decide whether to fire Hellfire or drop 500-pound bombs on our enemies.

I can still hear the Ripper pilot’s urgent voice vividly in my ears.

Finally, after I answered that question, I ran through countless M240 machine gun bullets pouring down from the night sky, trying to guide the bombardment with lasers.

Step by step, I ran through the mud, and ironically, it was only then that I realized how much I was attached to and had a longing for life.

As I was in the middle of a war zone, the faces of my dad, Claire, Enzo, and my work friends all came to mind, and I felt a strong attachment to life, a desire to return to the world they were in.

And in that crazy, fate-determining moment, I really made up my mind.

If I survive here, I will never again go near a combat zone like this.

Phew!

Now that I’ve really come this far, haven’t I done my duty as a human being to the people who saved my life?

* * *

Before I even get home, I can hear the washing machine running inside my house.

Enzo and I used to go to a laundromat across the street to do our laundry because the washing machine rinse water from the second floor always overflowed into the sewer on the first floor.

By the way, who the hell is running the washing machine?

And this late at night.

“Hey! Who’s using the washing machine? Are you so thoughtless?”

I completely forgot the relief of having escaped the den of the terrifying Colombian cartel, and suddenly the lid opened and I screamed before I even entered the second floor.

However, the person waiting for me on the second floor is not Enzo in his pants, but Shim Yu-jeong, the ‘gobpiri human’ who is spending the last stormy period in Old Koreatown.

I wonder what the youngest daughter of the car center family is doing here at this hour?

“Oh, why are you screaming as soon as you get here, oppa?”

Ah, that guy’s speech is so rebellious and seems to hate adults, it really annoys me.

Rather than hearing that voice, I think I’d rather have a farewell shootout with the Medellin Cartel mercenaries.

The youngest daughter of the auto repair shop owner, dressed in hip-hop style like American punks, shouts at me again from the kitchen of our house without even looking at me.

“What are you doing standing there, Oppa? If you want to come in, come in. If you don’t want to come in, just close the door and leave.”

When I heard that loud noise, my mind was spinning so much that I forgot my extreme fatigue for a moment.

I shouted at the punk kid with a dumbfounded expression.

“Not oppa, but uncle, uncle! Mom, when you were a kid, I set the table for you and gave you a ride when you first started elementary school. And yet, you keep calling me oppa and shortening your words?”

Then, he throws down the sealed container he was holding on the table and talks back.

“Oh, I don’t know, dude! My brother and my uncle are all the same old farts, you know. They keep talking about all that stuff, what unlucky me.”

The almonds that Sim Yu-jeong was feeding Hector from an airtight container that she had left on the table flew everywhere.

I had a hard time finding fresh, non-rancid almonds in a Mexican neighborhood, and this guy threw them at me in a fit of rage.

I was about to scream out loud when I got even more angry, but the moment I saw my bed on the opposite side of the window from where Yujeong was standing, I unconsciously shut my mouth.

Enzo, in his work attire, is sitting on my bed, absorbed in something, and upon closer inspection, Yujeong is seen sewing what appears to be a cheerleader uniform.

I couldn’t help but keep my mouth shut when I saw a Puerto Rican man struggling with a needle and thread that looked like a mackerel thorn in his hand, which was the size of a pot lid.

“Hey, Man! Yujeong needs some alterations to her cheerleader uniform, but I have to go to work right now. So, Kim, please~.”

I barely managed to get back alive from the wreckage, only to find myself in this absurd situation.

It’s so absurd, I can’t even laugh.

Enzo places the uniform he was sewing on my bed and suddenly walks towards me with brisk strides.

I can’t even think of anything to say to Enzo’s disgustingly awkward expression as he heads towards the door, deliberately avoiding Yujeong and my gaze.

Yujeong is wearing large glasses that cover half of her face and is glaring at Enzo, who is running away, avoiding her gaze.

I put my duffel bag down next to the bed and shouted at Shim Yu-jeong.

“Hey, you punk! How many times have I told you not to bother that Puerto Rican uncle? He’s not a Korean guy from Koreatown. If you try to harass him like that, you’ll be taken to the police station. And aren’t you scared? Aren’t you scared of someone who looks so scary?”

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“You’re a racist. Are big black guys the ones we should all be afraid of? How upset would Uncle Enzo be if he heard that?”

It’s a battle of words between teenagers.

Oh, seriously, where did I put my gun?

I also accepted it while thinking about that.

“I’m the older brother, and Enzo is the uncle?”

“Isn’t it normal for you to like it more when I call you oppa? You find fault with everything and make a fuss. Is it because I’m the most trustworthy person in the Lawrence neighborhood that you only do this to me? When Young-sook from the tailor shop says something to oppa, you get angry and only yell at me like that?”

“Who is the one who broke the law? This punk is talking nonsense…”

Before I could finish speaking, Sim Yu-jeong quickly walked towards me.

Hector, who had been on the bed, was startled by the sight of Shim Yu-jeong rushing towards him and ran away flapping his wings roughly.

The owner of the Old Koreatown acne mask shouts at me, holding up the uniform that Enzo had sewn for him.

“Please sew this up quickly. I have to practice cheering with the kids later!”

I looked at the kid with a dumbfounded expression and asked.

“Why didn’t you ask your mother to do it for you? Why did you come here and make a fuss?”

Then, all of a sudden, I became dumb and couldn’t say anything.

As always, he probably came here because he talked back to his mom and dad and got kicked out.

I sat down on my bed, heavy as a ton of water, and started sewing a uniform for a crazy teenage girl.

Damn, am I still dreaming on the plane back to Chicago?

* * *

After the hurricane called Sim Yu-jeong swept through our house, I lay in bed for a while.

Goose Dad, Enzo, keeps the house so clean that even the bed sheets and my pillow smell like lavender (fabric softener).

It felt a little like I was back in a civilized world, a safe civilized world where no one was shooting at me to blow my head off.

I fell into a deep sleep like that.

It was late so there wasn’t much traffic, but I could hear cars passing by outside my window.

Inside the house, Hector could also be heard walking around, making footsteps.

When Hector suddenly said in a deep voice, ‘Ah, this is annoying, really,’ I was startled, but I still continued to lie down.

I came back to this peaceful daily life in ‘One Piece’ and am lying down like this.

That was before Claire got here, too.

I’ve been telling our Wizard R&R guys to keep quiet about everything that happened in Colombia, so if I get home before Claire, everything’s okay.

I was falling into a deeper sleep with that thought, but then I heard a sound again and opened my eyes slightly.

I heard the sound of dishes being washed in the kitchen, so I quickly checked the time on my smartwatch.

If Enzo is not supposed to be home from work and someone is fiddling around in the kitchen, Claire is there.

I opened my eyes with difficulty, moving my heavy eyelids.

Then I spoke to the kitchen.

“hey!”

At the words I casually threw out, the sound of the dishes stopped.

Then, Claire’s voice is heard.

“hey!”

The moment I hear Claire’s voice, tears well up in my eyes without me knowing, as if my tear ducts are exploding.

“I was moving carefully because you were sleeping, sorry, Kim!”

Claire’s words made my throat choke up, so instead of answering, I raised my hand.

“I just made some coffee. Would you like a cup?”

I barely managed to control my voice and responded to that.

“No, I’m fine.”

Claire said as she walked slowly towards me holding a mug of coffee.

“Those damn FBI Florida guys have been dragging their feet on our CBP investigation for ages, and I almost missed my flight back to Chicago today because of them. By the way, how was Wizard R&R?”

I wanted to say, “With two Mk.82 aerial bombs, we wiped out the Cartel’s elite mercenary force from this planet…” but I swallowed those words.

Instead, he lied and kissed the old men.

“We did all the security work together, but I got robbed of $200 while playing poker with some old men.”

Claire chuckles at those words and sits down on the edge of my bed.

“Don’t play poker with those pops! There are probably people with that level of experience who could make some pocket money at the casino.”

After saying that, Claire checks the messages on the smartphone she is holding in her other hand.

I slowly got up, then turned around as I always did and laid down again, resting my head on Claire’s lap.

Claire checks her text messages while drinking her coffee carefully so as not to spill it on her face.

We stayed like that in silence for a while.

I quietly ruminate on the thought that this is the happiest moment of my life.

Listening to Claire’s breathing and smelling the sunscreen she wears 365 days a year made me realize that I was home alive.

This was definitely not a dream, but the real world.

I will never go near a world where guns are used again.

I kept thinking about that thought, that decision, as I lay with my head on the lap of the woman I loved.

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