God of Piano - God of Piano chapter 108
“…isn’t this enough?”
[Without certainty in my heart, should I just pay attention? If you were trying to figure out how much I had for her, yes, no. don’t be ]
“That’s right… I guess.”
[You are young. ]
Brahms sighed. However, rather than a sigh that Rowoon let out because he was so pathetic, it was more like a sigh that he couldn’t stand because he was cute and admirable, but his stupidity was bothering him.
[It’s only natural that I couldn’t capture everything I had when I wrote that song. Just because you look into and understand everything about me, it doesn’t make it yours. ]
“yes. I know that. ······Do my own performance. Is that what you want to say?”
[Your struggle to understand me, as I said before, I don’t hate it. but······. ]
Brahms said in a lonely voice. As if he was telling a story that no one would listen to, as if Rowoon would never hear his voice.
like muttering.
[Understanding and trying to understand are two different things. ]
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Understanding and understanding are two different things. In many ways, the words that Brahms threw in passing had no choice but to remain in Rowoon’s head for a long time.
‘In the meantime, to be honest… I did try to understand them for quite calculating reasons.’
I have no choice but to admit it. The reason Rowoon wants to understand Brahms is not because of human likeability. No, it cannot be said that there is no human liking at all, but in the end, it was an undeniable fact that the most important reason was musical achievement.
But let’s change the question a bit.
‘Can friendship based on calculations exist?’
If someone were to ask that question, the majority would probably answer no. Relationships between people are the cleanest and most sincere when money and other calculations do not intervene.
However, in relation to all musicians, Rowoon’s attitude was always mixed with calculation.
‘Maybe it’s not polite.’
I felt sorry for nothing. They probably won’t get anything from Rowoon, but nevertheless, they always try to pass on their everything to Rowoon, but rather than being their friend, Rowoon is preoccupied with being greedy and preoccupied with the gifts they give.
It was the same for Rami. Of course, he hadn’t done anything directly wrong with her yet, but even though he couldn’t genuinely like her or hate her, he felt ashamed to look back at himself for trying to use her as a sacrifice for growth.
That may have been the case. After being bludgeoned by Brahms, Rowoon had no choice but to become a little more cautious and kinder in his attitude toward Rami. It was as if the thief was paralyzed, but to Rami, who was unaware of the situation, Rowoon couldn’t help but look quite unfamiliar.
“What are you doing these days?”
“why. What did I do?”
“No, I just said it. Why are you brushing the dust off my chair all of a sudden? Normally, I wouldn’t even bother sitting on the bare floor. What have you done wrong to me?”
“…”
“You did it. wrong? what is it, just tell me If you tell me now, I will forgive you.”
“To say it now, I’ve never seen anyone who forgives just because they say they will.”
“I must have made a mistake. Seeing you say this?”
“No, nothing special. You don’t have to worry about it.”
“…are you very concerned?”
Rami raised her eyebrows. However, Rowoon had no intention of telling Rami about him until he entered the tomb. I had to know love in order to understand Brahms, and I tried to do something because I thought you were the person who had the closest feelings to love. How can you say that?
“…”
And Heather was looking at those two with a rather complicated expression. Women’s intuition is always treated as a superstition, but even so, there is a reason why the superstition that women’s intuition is accurate has spread so far internationally.
‘Ah, so suddenly?’
Heather carefully examined the faces of Rowoon and Rami. To be honest, Rami had the same poker face as usual. She was better than most adults when it came to sorting out her inner thoughts.
But Rowoon was different. It was difficult to express how different it was, but something was definitely different. a look. voice. attitude. expression. gesture. posture. Everything about him toward Rami was different from before. Heather was just vaguely aware. None of them were ever directed at Heather. At least that much was certain.
‘why?’
It was that part that Heather couldn’t understand the most. So far, there has been no portent, and there has been no incident that could be called a trigger. But why all of a sudden in the morning?
Of course, Heather couldn’t ask him about it, and even if she did, she wouldn’t get an answer. Because it was a story that no one could bring out.
However, as Heather noticed, Rowoon’s attitude toward Rami has definitely changed compared to before.
Rowoon himself felt the change. When looking at Rami, Rowoon looked more closely. I watched longer, thought more. If there is a blemish on her skin, you can keep your eyes on it for a few minutes, and you can think for a long time about the shape of your eyebrows, the line of your neck and the color of your lips.
And such a series of thoughts eventually drowns a person in a swamp. Rowoon found himself habitually thinking of Rami before he knew it.
‘… Compared to Brahms, yes, it must be lacking.’
But young people have their own way of loving. Rowoon was excited and excited in his own way.
And, I started to melt all those emotions into my performance.
It is a performance that drew attention from others just by imitating Brahms’ performance. The more Rowoon understood his heart, the more he got a sense of what love was, the more the performance had no choice but to shed all remaining skin and begin to shine little by little.
and,
“…”
Heather didn’t like that.
It is also natural to show expressions to Rami that were not shown to her.
The fact that the guy who knew nothing but the piano suddenly wanted to date Rami, staring intently at Rami.
But, despite this, the performance, far from being sloppy, rather starts to resonate more sweetly…
‘Why are you doing this now? Beneficial.’
okay. Either way, I didn’t like it.
It is unavoidable. Even so, Heather was never in a position to support Rowoon and Rami.
I don’t know that fool who only knows the piano,
Just as Rowoon makes a face he doesn’t show to Heather when he sees Rami,
Heather also made a lot of facial expressions when she saw Rowoon, probably others wouldn’t have seen them.
I’m not sure when it was,
Heather, too, was able to think a lot just by looking at Rowoon’s face.
< Two Hearts (6) > End
< Two Hearts (7) >
“it’s annoying.”
Heather, who returned home, immediately threw herself nervously onto the bed. crumpled impression. two eyes wide open. Hands tightly gripping the phone, and toes curled up with great force. header. Heather Hong. sigh. thought. and worry.
“Since when…?”
I asked myself, but there was no way I could come up with an answer. It’s hard to know about your own feelings, but what if it’s someone else’s?
In the first place, Heather couldn’t believe that I was feeling this way. It wasn’t that I didn’t know that I had a crush on Rowoon. But I thought it wouldn’t be serious, and I thought she wouldn’t be dominated by that feeling.
‘good. Admit it. I lost.’
Heather had just accepted that her emotions were taking over him now. Can not help it. No matter how proud she was, in the end she was still only a college student, an age more suited to immaturity than maturity. It was still not enough to act as if I could play on top of my emotions.
‘It’s Rami’s sister…’
Honestly, there is nothing strange about it. She was a shining person. Of course, someone might say that Heather also shines the same way, and there is no need to be discouraged in front of Rami. There is nothing wrong with that statement. But Heather, if no one else knows Heather. I don’t know what properties Lamy’s light might have, but at least Heather’s light is artificial, not natural.
Yes, Heather’s light is all made with hard work. Her bright image, flamboyant style, and her eloquence and tension that make the people around her feel good were all supported by Heather’s conscious efforts to some extent.
However, Rami has a different character from Heather. she didn’t try Since I am such a pretty and attractive person, please do not beg me to love me. Nevertheless, people open their mouths while looking at Rami without even realizing it, and muttering like that. ‘stylish.’
The people who are flocking around right now may have more headers. But there was an essential difference between the way they looked at Heather and the way they looked at Rami. The difference may not mean superiority or inferiority, but nonetheless…
At this moment, Heather can’t let go of the thought of losing.
‘What are you doing, Heather? It’s not a child, it’s cool to have a man. Ah… Come to think of it, it’s not like adults don’t whine about dating.’
‘Did you really think you were going to do something? no. To be honest, we were too friends for that.’
‘There’s nothing wrong with just going like this. Nothing will change. Just treat it like you normally would.’
‘What would Rami unnie think of him? Can you be considered like a man even though you’re a younger brother? Ah, come to think of it, the age difference was only 2 weeks…’
Thoughts lingered on tail after tail, and the more he did, the more Heather couldn’t help but feel her teeth grinding. Maybe he thought there was no need to rush because he was always by my side. Perhaps, it was because she believed too much that the sympathy she had been sharing would not be hers alone. As time passed, Heather vaguely thought that Rowoon and her would have no choice but to stick together naturally.
From noble mtl dot com
But now, in the end, Heather was paying the price for that complacency. Rowoon wants to leave. No, leaving may be an inappropriate expression. Because Rowoon never belonged to her in the first place.
‘Should I sneak a peek at Rami unnie? What do you think?’
Heather raised her phone with that thought in mind, then sighed and buried her face in the pillow. Rami is not an ordinary woman. No matter how hard Heather tries to hide her ulterior motives, she will figure out Heather’s true intentions in an instant.
Whether Rami liked Rowoon or Jungwoo, he didn’t want to show her Heather’s bottom. That was Heather’s last remaining pride.
‘But what if you build up your pride? I already lost completely.’
Heather sighed. I wanted to relieve stress by doing something right away, but honestly, there was nothing to do in this hostel except for the phone.
So when she came to her senses, she was sitting at the piano not knowing what to think. Paganini Variations. For Heather, this is a song that will probably remind her of Rowoon whenever she plays it for the rest of her life. Ever since she performed this piece at the Los Angeles International Piano Competition and lost to Rowoon, Brahms’s Paganini always reminded Heather of the two words ‘defeat’.
‘Does it pass again this time?’
Heather’s expression darkened. accustomed to losing She was always on high ground in the eyes of others, but it wasn’t always the winner’s seat. Neither a winner nor a loser, somewhere ambiguous.
I want to break this chain, but the chain that binds her is about to break, but I refuse to let her go. She, who has walked in the spotlight all her life, is not always the owner of that light, even though she shines.
In such agony, Heather played while thinking of “that” she couldn’t grasp no matter how hard she tried. I didn’t want to think about anything at this moment. Knowing that nothing would change even if she thought about it, she let go of everything.
understand the musicians Don’t follow Rowoon. Keep your colors, but keep your lines. All this time she lived under a lot of advice. And whether she was conscious of it or not, those numerous ‘words’ clung to her playing and at some point dragged her sound in a direction she didn’t intend.
‘I hate it now.’
And Heather pushed the keys more furiously than ever before, shaking off all those words. I don’t want to get entangled. I don’t want to get entangled. I want to see the piano as a piano. I want to pour out this feeling, emotion, and all of them as much as I can. And, she did.
“······Heather?”
practice room. After reading the sheet music for a while, Rowoon turned his head. The sound of the Paganini Variations was coming. Heather wasn’t the only one who prepared Paganini for this competition, but her performance was different from anyone else’s, so it wasn’t too difficult to guess that it was Heather’s performance.
But it wasn’t because I had never heard of Heather’s Paganini. Now this performance is more heather-like than ever, but rather, that’s why it was different from before. From that point of view, Heather’s playing so far may not have been Heather-like enough.
Rowoon stood up from his seat. Then I left the practice room and moved to where the sound came from. And it wasn’t just Rowoon who did that. Anyone who had ears could only hear and understand. What makes this performance special now?
“Is it Heather?”