I Became the Burden of a Conscienceless Party - I Became the Burden of a Conscienceless Party chapter 201

201 – Side Story 2. The Story After, Irina (4)

The story afterward, Irina (4)

Since God does not exist, it is possible to worship and believe in him.

Because the being called a god, which is beyond human understanding, exerts transcendent powers, people are able to be overwhelmed by them, revere them, and idolize them.

But when that being outside of understanding enters into understanding.

What will happen to people?

“The more people try to understand and save God rather than follow His will, the more they lose their faith.”

In that sense, the ending of the god who created all kinds of miracles but had no substance ended up taking away the starting point of faith from people.

A being that was supposed to be transcendent has become corrupted, sealed, and lost its power.

The faith that was once absolute was cracked.

so that…….

The status of the Celestials, who were not something transcendent, but simply superior to others, plummeted and the warrior party took over their place.

Public opinion created by the warrior party in order to place Jim on the Demon King’s throne.

Because of this, the status of the warrior party rose beyond imagination, and the status of Irina, who had been acting to save the absolute majority from the beginning, ended up surpassing that of a celestial god.

“I made it like that.”

For a saint who must serve the gods, this decision could not be worse.

Because he brought down the god he served and stood on top of it.

Irina, who was able to look at the situation objectively only after it was over, was able to realize it.

“I am no longer your follower, but just a powerful man who will do anything to get what he wants.”

If I were my old self, I would never have made that choice.

Human Irina is that kind of person, but divine Irina is different.

Never, ever, harm the status of God or question his actions.

She got her hands dirty to save the Celestial Sect and led it in that way.

All of it for the sake of the Church of God, and more broadly, for the sake of faith.

It must have been so… … .

“I don’t know anymore.”

Irina could no longer understand what she wanted.

Is it faith or power?

Did you want to save people? Did you want to elevate your status?

Is the expression she’s making right now hers, or is it something she’s putting on for people to see?

A girl who lost what was her own.

“So before it’s too late.”

The Celestial Church must disappear.

It would have been right even without her presence.

Yes, that was a long time ago.

It would have been right for a religious order to disappear after losing its god to worship, but wasn’t it Irina who held on to it so stubbornly?

Although there was a just cause to save the children of the monastery under the care of the Cheonshin Order, there was no reason for it to necessarily take the form of a religious order.

If Irina had had her abilities, the other direction would have been faster.

“I think it would be right to put it back the way it was.”

Her purpose has already been achieved, so if we continue to hope for more, what she once considered to be helpless will no longer be helpless. Therefore, the Celestial Spirit Sect must disappear.

“So, Mr. Jim, I want to apologize for all the things I’ve done in your name so far.”

“An apple… … .”

At first, I moved the classroom with the sole purpose of finding the luggage, but my thoughts changed midway through.

Irina was able to step back from jealousy and stubbornness and look at herself objectively. As a result, she realized that she had not been believing in God, but rather using him.

So I wanted to apologize.

On the way back, that was the reason I didn’t do anything to Jim.

That was also the reason why I tailored everything to him.

“… … And I have to return the things I have built up through my stubbornness to their original state.”

It’s okay if she’s not around anymore. Those she was trying to save are already dead or have found their own way.

There is no need to forcibly hold on to the Celestial Church, which should have collapsed by now; the problem will be easily solved if she simply steps down.

Yes, because she can soon be said to be the backbone of the Celestial Spirit Cult.

So the believers believe in her more deeply than in God.

Jim knew.

Irina is a strong person.

Her mental strength is stronger than that of anyone in the warrior party.

But, that is because it is an iron wall built on a foundation of a mentality that has already collapsed.

She can endure because she has been hurt more than anyone else and has already fallen into the pit of despair.

Yes, that’s when I saw all the monasteries that the Celestial Order couldn’t take responsibility for.

I was just imprinting that sight on my mind and seeing everything else as a blur.

“I just wanted to say… … I’m sorry, Jim. I know it’s embarrassing for you to apologize like this, but… … .”

Perhaps even this apology is just self-satisfaction, since she has already begun to doubt her own sincerity.

“Irina.”

“My story ends here. I wanted to apologize, and in return, I will leave the Celestial Sect. If I were to summarize, it would be something like this.”

“… … It’s not good to push yourself like that.”

“really?”

The words were spoken at Irina’s dangerous appearance. However, Irina responded with a gentle smile.

“Mr. Jim, what do you think my expression is like right now? How do I look?”

“… … .”

Irina’s expression seemed relieved. At least it seemed so on the outside.

“how is it?”

It became possible to make such expressions at will.

That’s why I was speechless.

Even though I had to comfort her, I was speechless for a moment.

Because it really seemed that way. Because I started to think that maybe everything I’ve said so far wasn’t true.

Because you can tell a perfect lie, you are suspected of being wrong.

Because he was so quick-witted and adept at reading people’s emotions, he lost the ability to understand his own emotions.

Yeah, that’s right.

“That was a boring story, wasn’t it? Shall we stop here?”

“It’s not a story that can be ended so simply. Don’t you know that?”

“is that so?”

Irina tilted her head.

As if it was really an unimportant story.

I know that’s a lie. The real feelings hidden behind that perfect mask are a mess.

But, I don’t know.

Irina’s expression was perfect and there was no sign of negativity at all. It was a perfect mask.

And that is why we must not leave it alone. Until we see the real face hidden behind that mask, Jim’s voice will not reach us either.

“You don’t know, do you?”

“… … .”

“Mr. Jim, it’s good that you’re easy to understand.”

And that hesitation was plain to see in Irina’s eyes. A psychological understanding that did not even allow for superficiality. That was the chronic disease that Irina had developed.

“Well, since you listened to my story, shall we move on to the next step?”

“……yes?”

“I told you before we started talking. If you listen to me seriously, I’ll tell you what I couldn’t do that day.”

If it were a regular load, it would be a fire that would bite you in the butt. However, luggage is also people.

Wouldn’t it be a good idea to prioritize releasing your desires on a girl who harbors such wounds?

“… … That’s right.”

But, I decided to do it.

***

Jim remembers the moment when Irina’s mask broke.

The incident at the lake was planned by Irina. So her facial expressions were perfect, and Jim couldn’t help but be fooled by them.

But, the moment Jim expressed his honest feelings was different.

-Can I ask you something? Why do you take a bath with your clothes on?

-Are you disappointed that you’re not naked?

-No, it’s more obscene.

-oh…….

The behavior Irina showed at that time.

An unconscious behavior of shrinking and covering one’s body.

Could even that have been an act staged to deceive Jim?

No, that can’t be true.

‘I was the one who seduced her first, so there’s no reason for me to react like that.’

At least at that time, it was right for Irina to seduce Jim in order to take his mind off of him.

That kind of atmosphere was created, and Jim was so nervous that he swallowed his saliva several times.

However, Irina’s honest reaction changed the atmosphere.

It was definitely a strange atmosphere, but it was definitely different from what Irina had expected.

Irina was sloppy back then.

And Irina has always been a bit sloppy in that regard.

That’s why I said I would match Irina’s stride.

So, there will be no other opportunity to see the true feelings hidden behind Irina’s mask than in this situation.

Yeah, so Jim was planning to show it to Irina.

“What should I do? Should I take it off?”

“No, you can stay as is.”

A side of herself she’d never seen before.

“I’ll take care of it, so Irina, just do as I say. Okay?”

“Ah yes…….”

So Jim took Irina’s hand and led her to his bed.

The beginning is atmospheric and gentle, just like it was with Lilith.

But what happens next will be just as devastating as what happened to Milia.

Yeah, let’s do that.

“You understand? You have to do exactly what I say.”

“… … ?”

Bring out her true feelings.