I Became the Master of the Empress - Chapter 291



295

I told him I wouldn’t return to my brother.

I couldn’t bring myself to say that the children were captured and couldn’t come back.

I just said I was sorry… I was sorry, crying as I spoke, but my brother almost fought with Valoran, yet thanks to Alfred’s mediation, who pointed out that the situation would become complicated due to diplomatic issues, a fight was averted.

Instead…

I heard that they increased financial support on the condition that they wouldn’t exercise violence against me and the children.

Valoran kept his promise well, except for the violence he inflicted in bed.

But when Roden turned two years old.

My second trial in life approached.

“There’s military training tomorrow. Bring Roden out there.”

I couldn’t understand why they wanted me to bring a two-year-old child to a military training ground.

“Dear, I’m a bit dull and don’t quite understand, so I have to ask. Roden is only two years old, why would he go to a military training ground…”

– Smack!

He slammed the spoon down harshly and said.

“What do you think you’ll do knowing what I’m doing? A woman should act like a woman. I won’t say it twice.”

With his menacing tone, I nodded.

Since my brother returned, he wielded less violence than before.

So the next morning.

I dressed Roden warmly so he wouldn’t catch a cold.

“Mom! Can’t I go too? I want to be with you…”

I patted Octavia’s head, which was pouting.

“The military training ground is a dangerous place; I’ll take you when you’re a bit older.”

“Ugh, but why is Roden going? He’s younger and smaller than me!”

“Ah… Nuna! Gati ga!”

Roden reached out to Octavia.

I embrace Roden.

“Roden may be young, but he’s a boy, right? Hehe, I’ll be back soon, so don’t cause any trouble and just stay still.”

Octavia is subtly mischievous.

Sometimes, when I’m not looking, she has used my cosmetics or even broken things.

“Ugh… I got it.”

I wave my hand in greeting to the gloomy-looking Octavia.

“I’ll be back. Roden, you should say goodbye to your sister too, right?”

“Caw!”

“Have a good trip~”

With that, I headed towards the military training ground, escorted by Octavia.

“Ah? Your Highness the Grand Duchess. I shall escort you. Please come this way.”

As I followed the soldiers to him, I asked a curious question.

“Can you tell me what on earth is happening today that required Roden’s presence?”

The soldier paused for a moment, contemplating, before he replied.

“Today, there is only the projectile training.”

“Projectile training?”

“It’s the training where you throw metal chunks filled with fireballs.”

I nodded at the soldier’s words.

“But… it’s not the kind of training that the noble would typically observe.”

I questioned the soldier, who trailed off at the end of his sentence.

“Pardon? Why is that?”

He covered his ears with his hands as he spoke.

“Well… it’s quite loud. When it explodes, the sound is tremendous, and it often damages eardrums.”

Damages eardrums?

– Shiver…

A sudden wave of fear washed over me.

“We have arrived.”

At the soldier’s words, I turned my head to see dozens of soldiers lying flat on the training ground.

“Men! I am disappointed in you. Is that the best accuracy you can manage?!”

– Thud!, Thud!

I was startled by the sight of him striking the soldiers’ behinds with a large iron club.

“No! I can do better!”

-Whack!

“Your voice is too quiet! How can the Giant Brigade become the strongest like that?!”

As he continued to hit the soldiers’ behinds, Roden began to tremble.

“Mom, it’s scary… it’s scary…”

“It’s okay, I’ll protect you. Alright? It’s okay.”

After a while of inflicting punishment, he turned to look at me.

“If you’ve come, stand by my side.”

As I stood next to him, he surveyed the surroundings and spoke.

“If the hit rate comes out like that again, I won’t let it slide. Everyone, to your positions!”

-Everyone, to your positions!

“Prepare to throw!”

-Prepare to throw!

The soldiers moved with precision.

One soldier tore a scroll and stuffed it into a metal chunk the size of a human head.

“Target locked!”

The men took the massive piece of metal, assuming a stance as if to throw a shot put.

-Target locked!

“Throw!”

-Throw!

The large metal chunk fell in a parabolic arc…

-Whuuum!

-Whuuum!

“Ahhh!”

A tremendous roar shook the ground.

“Uwaaah!”

As the ground trembled from the explosion, Roden began to cry, and I patted his back to soothe him.

“It’s okay. Roden is okay. Don’t worry. Mommy is right here, isn’t she?”

“Waaah! Scary! Scary!”

Roden cries like that, but Valoran gives his orders indifferently.

“Prepare for the throw!”

-Prepare for the throw!

“Darling? I really don’t think Roden should be here.”

From noble mtl dot com

Roden’s crying is alarming.

His body trembles uncontrollably.

“Shut up, that child is my successor. If so, he needs to get used to the throw. Aim at the target!”

“Darling? Still, this is…”

-Aim at the target!

“Throw!”

-Throw!

“Ueeeeeeng!”

I’m at a loss, patting Roden’s back to comfort him…

I see red blood trickling from Roden’s ear.

“Blood?! Roden, are you okay? Are you really okay?”

As I hold Roden, who shakes his head and cries almost in despair, trying to leave the training ground.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“Blood is flowing from Roden’s ear. We need to see a doctor.”

“Did you not hear me? Roden needs to get used to the throw as my successor!”

“Is that even something to say? What good is it if the child dies?!”

“If he dies, he’s defective. And if he’s going to die from this, then that kind of child dying would actually be more beneficial to the Grand Duchy.”

“You’re insane… insane…”

I try to leave, but he grabs my arm and commands me.

“Prepare for the throw!”

-Prepare for the throw!

“Let go of me! We need to see a doctor! He’s bleeding!”

No matter how much I plead, he stubbornly gives his orders.

“Aim at the target!”

-Aim at the target!

“Ah… nooo!”

—

The explosive sounds erupting without pause.

Before long, Roden’s eyes were filled with tears, and his mouth foamed as his body convulsed.

“Roden, oh… Roden, don’t… if you leave too… you can’t… it can’t be… nooo~!”

“Prepare the rifles! What are you all doing?! Moving like slugs, what do you think you’ll accomplish?! Hurry up and get ready?!”

And that training… went on for nearly three hours.

Roden became a star in the night sky, and once again, I buried a child in my heart.

***

Roden’s cause of death is presumed to be a ruptured eardrum from the deafening noise, along with fear and breathing difficulties due to stress.

How terrified must this child have been?

Roden, desperately searching for me until the moment of death.

I can’t forget the sight of him trembling, tears and snot streaming down his face.

Even now, it feels as if that scene is vividly alive, as if he is still clutching my clothes and shivering in my arms.

Roden’s funeral.

As I looked at Roden lying in the small coffin, Octavia whispered softly to me.

“Mom? Roden isn’t moving. It seems like he’s been sleeping for too long.”

“Ugh… is that so?”

How can I explain to this child that Roden is dead?

Ah… Roden.

Instead of sitting beside me, I approached Roden and gently stroked his cheek.

“Roden? Wake up from your sleep… Are you cold, Roden?”

But did he sense something strange?

“Mom? Roden’s body is so cold, what if he catches a cold like this?”

At those words, the tears I had been holding back burst forth.

“Ugh…”

“Your Highness. The Grand Duchess must be in shock; let her be alone for a moment.”

A young maid gently advised Octavia, who looked at Roden with a worried expression.

“But… what if Roden catches a cold with his body so cold?”

“Roden… the young master will be… alright.”

“No! I don’t want Roden to be sick!”

With those words, Octavia dashed out of the funeral home.

—

—

Now four years old, Octavia.

I don’t know how to explain to her that her sibling has died.

I don’t know… anything.

I don’t know what to do, why Valoran kills his children, or how to explain it to Octavia.

I don’t know a single thing.

– Tap, tap.

The sound of small footsteps echoed quickly in the funeral home.

“Haah, haah…”

Octavia, holding a small blanket in her hands, hurriedly walked over to the coffin where Roden lay at rest, panting.

“Roden, if you just lie there, you’ll catch a cold. I’ll give you my favorite blanket, so cover yourself warmly.”

Watching Octavia gently drape the blanket over Roden’s body makes my heart feel like it’s being torn apart even more.

Ah… Roden.

You too are leaving me.

This unworthy mother couldn’t protect you.

I couldn’t protect Rohan either. I couldn’t protect you, could I?

How am I supposed to live in this world?

Hate and blame this foolish mother.

I’m sorry, truly sorry…

Rohan and Roden.

Before these two children, I am a sinner.

How am I supposed to live from now on?

No, do I even have the right to live?

As the funeral came to an end, as we prepared to lay Roden to rest in the Ryan family tomb.

“Mom? Are we leaving Roden here? He’ll be scared when he wakes up, won’t he?”

Octavia fidgeted, looking at Roden laid in the dark tomb.

“It’s okay. His ancestors are here, and Rohan is here too… It’ll be alright. So let’s go now.”

But Octavia couldn’t bring herself to leave.

“Then when will Roden… come back?”

I wiped away my tears and said.

“Roden will be here from now on.”

My child rolled her eyes and frowned as she shouted.

“I don’t want to! Take Roden too! I’m sure Roden doesn’t want to be here!”

“No… Roden can’t stay with us; Roden is going to a better place.”

Octavia blinked her eyes and asked.

“Then when will he come back?”

Tears flowed again at Octavia’s innocent question.

“Um, later… when our Octavia grows up… we’ll be able to meet again.”

Octavia shook her head, tears beginning to well in her eyes.

“Waaah… I don’t want to… Why does Roden get to go to a good place? He left me and Mom behind to go to a good place all by himself? Why? Why did he go to a good place without me and Mom? Roden is bad!”

I hugged Octavia tightly and patted her back.

“I’m sorry, my dear. I’m so sorry… Via, Roden…”

“Waaah, Mom, don’t cry. I did something wrong! I won’t cry, so don’t cry, Mom! When you cry, it makes me sad. Waaah…”

We continued to cry together.

—