I Was Sick of Loving You - I Was Sick of Loving You chapter 50

50 – trials and miracles

Memories come back, and you know that everything is an illusion created by the ordeal. I know that the children in front of me are fake. I know that the time I spent with my children is a made-up fiction.

However, the feelings I felt are not lies.

The feeling of being happy just by looking at the children is not a lie. Thanks to the children’s gratitude, it is not a lie to be filled with emotion. The feeling of loving children right in front of you is not a lie.

Those feelings that are not lies still fill me up… How can I cut out the children with my own hands?

What father in the world could kill his child with his own hands? Even if it’s an illusion, I can’t. I can’t get over this ordeal.

An insurmountable ordeal weighed down on me, and a sense of despair was born.

“Who would you choose, father?”

“Dad, who will you choose?”

Children are prompted to make choices.

please don’t do that Please don’t spoil my happiness. Please don’t tarnish my dreams.

If I hadn’t been through trials, it wouldn’t have been so painful. If I had known it would be such an ordeal, I would not have taken on the challenge. How can you be so cruel?

The cruel ordeal gave him strength in his legs and he sat down on the floor. As I sat down on the floor, the children approached me and put a sword in my hand. The warmth that passed in that moment was cruel.

The cruel warmth leaves, and I hear words that taint my happiness again.

“Father, would you choose me?”

“Or will you choose me?”

Every single word from the children pierces and tears my heart. The heart that was so tattered flowed out of my mouth.

“I… can’t choose.”

“So, are you giving up?”

“Are you giving up?”

Giving up… Giving up would make it easier. But if I miss this opportunity, can I break her curse?

He asked me a question I knew the answer to.

It’s close to impossible. No matter how many miracles there are in the world, I have not been able to find them even though I have lived my whole life chasing them. Nothing will change in this life. This may be our only hope.

That thought catches me crumbling. I embraced the thoughts that gripped me and forced my legs to rise.

“No, I will not give up.”

“Then who would you choose?”

“Who will you choose?”

Again, I answered the questions that came to me with questions.

“Does it matter who I choose here?”

““It doesn’t matter.””

The dry voices of the children overlapped.

“then…”

Without saying a word, he cut my wrist. The blade left a shallow wound, and a small amount of blood trickled down the glass.

A faint light hovers around the glass containing a little blood. The light seemed to say that this was also the correct answer.

“I will choose me.”

The figures of the children dispersed, and a woman with white wings appeared.

“It can be overturned.”

Without answering those words, he cut my arm. Blood oozes out with pain.

“… You’re doing the same this time.”

The woman’s unknown words resound, and the wounds on her arms increase. Blood flowed from the enlarged wound and drenched the glass, making the dim light a little clearer.

Seeing the brightening light, I cut myself so that the blood wouldn’t stop. The wound continued to grow, and a slight dizziness came. The dizziness was my body’s warning, but I ignored it and continued to increase the wound.

The skin on his arms was tattered, and dizziness increased his size. The dizziness grew in size, but the glass was not even half full. The sight cut me off.

A part of me filled my glass, and a strange voice rang in my ear.

“Do I really have to do that?”

An eerie woman’s voice, as if I had heard it somewhere. Ignoring that voice, he continued to cut me out.

When the dizziness grew bigger and weighed me down, I heard a woman’s voice again.

“If you keep going, you will die.”

“There is no such thing.”

I didn’t think anything of it, but for some reason my mouth moved and answered. Ignoring the mouth that strayed from my will, I devoted myself entirely to cutting myself out.

「Huh, where does your confidence come from? Your body right now is different from the previous life and can’t stand it. It is an ordeal that has been given to you.”

“Know.”

“Even though I knew it, why did you say such nonsense?”

“Bianca and her pupil will help, so it’s okay.”

“Do you believe those weak bitches?”

“It’s a question that doesn’t even deserve an answer. Mind, just keep your mouth shut.”

After the words that the will that controlled my mouth had finished, the world became quiet. In a quiet world, I continued to cut myself out.

Pain and dizziness overwhelm me, and my consciousness is clouded. The blurred consciousness is cut off little by little. The world, which seemed to have been joined together, was filled with brilliant light.

A world full of light engulfs me, and a sense of floating comes. The light scattered, and a glass containing a huge light and the woman I saw earlier appeared.

“You have passed the ordeal.”

I have something to ask the woman, so I tried to open my mouth, but I couldn’t. I don’t even have the strength to open my mouth. There wasn’t much power left to hold on to the fading consciousness.

“I will guide you.”

With the woman’s words, my body rises into the air. The body that floated up followed the woman to the huge glass containing the light. The woman stopped in front of the huge glass and opened her mouth.

“All you have to do is think hard about what you want.”

After the woman’s words were finished, the floating body was swallowed by the light. In a dark world because it shines so brightly, I recited my wish in my heart.

‘May the curse on Iris and everyone in the Brandt family disappear.’

The light scattered along with the chanting. The light was scattered, and the place where the huge stone statue had been was spread out. Consciousness began to break again. In the world that was cut off, the voice of the stone statue was heard.

“Challenger… It’s done.”

The stone statue’s voice was cut off, and only the first and last words could be heard. But, even that was enough. It must mean that your wish has come true…

In the midst of a world that continues to be cut off, I squeezed my strength and reached out to my waist. My hand reached the bag on my waist, and the potion reached my hand. Grabbing the heavy potion and lifting it up, consciousness was interrupted again.

My consciousness, which had been cut off, came back, and I couldn’t feel the potion I held in my hand. When I turn my eyes, I see a potion lying a short distance away.

I tried to reach for the potion, but my body wouldn’t move anymore. We have reached a point where we cannot move by willpower alone. Blinking consciousness and powerless body. I could feel death hanging from them.

Due to a miracle, the life given again is about to end.

If I knew this was going to happen, I would have confessed while I was awake…

It’s a meaningless thought. It is the fleeting regret of those who are approaching death. It was a death he had faced once, but the fleeting regret did not go away. However, it was not a fleeting life like the last one. It wasn’t a life that didn’t accomplish anything.

I saw her smile that I wanted to see so much, and I enjoyed the happiness. and lifted her curse. So, life is not fleeting.

I’m sorry for Rachel and her, but for being such an idiot…

My eyes blur. Being immersed in a world where nothing can be seen because it is so blurry, it reminds me of my mother.

Mother, even though the poor son lived a foolish life, he kept his mother’s will. lived happily ever after. I was free to live as I wanted to live. And, I loved the one who loved me.

When the last complaint was over, it rained and soaked me. The rain continues to wet me, and something bitter enters my mouth. That writing doesn’t go over well.

As I couldn’t get over it, warmth came and supported my neck. Thanks to that, the bitter things that didn’t go well went down my throat. Everything I wrote went over, and I felt pain all over my body. And the sight returns.

Upon returning, I saw Iris who was shedding tears. It looked so sad, I tried to reach out my hand, but my hand wouldn’t move. My hand didn’t move, so I tried to open my mouth, but the bottle of red liquid blocked my mouth.

A bitter taste filled my mouth, and I was able to reach out my hand with only a little bit of strength back. I feel her warmth and coldness in my hands. Feeling the touch, I wiped away the tears that continued to flow. Still, her tears did not dry.

The potion dried up before her tears, and her mouth was free.

“Why are you crying so sadly?”

She cried for a long time and couldn’t answer. I wiped away her tears until she calmed down. Tears flowed incessantly, and her mouth opened.

“Why… do you do this? Don’t you hate me?”

Why does she think I’ll hate her? I don’t know.

I don’t know the answer, but the answer is decided.

“I don’t hate you. Rather, I love you.”

Her tears are strong again.

“I… have given you an irreparable wound.”

“I have never been hurt like that.”

“Don’t lie! I have neglected your love I did not accept your efforts and imprisoned you.”

From her words filled with deep sadness, I could understand the situation.

“…remember?”

“Yeah… I remember everything.”

“I see… Even so, I don’t hate you.”

“Why… why do you say that? I… I to you…”

Her tears hardened, and her words were cut off. He put his hand on her cheek and opened his mouth.

“I was sick of loving you. I felt like dying. However, the life of loving you wasn’t just painful.”

The briefly returned power begins to dissipate, and consciousness becomes hazy. the world blurs

“I was happy to have sword to sword with you. The time I expressed love to you was happy. I was happy to have the children you gifted me with. So, don’t beat yourself up too much. It’s all because of the curse…”

Unable to finish her words, darkness came along with her cries.