I Was Sick of Loving You - I Was Sick of Loving You chapter 58

58 – old man and old story

“You are still immature. so are you So do I,”

For some reason, the old man’s incomprehensible words penetrated deeply into his heart.

“I should have expected that when the mind was damaged, things engraved in the soul would flow in the empty place. I made you sick again because I was lacking.”

I felt like denying the old man’s bitter words. I don’t know why. I just want to. So I opened my mouth.

“It’s not like that. I don’t know who you are, and I don’t know what you’re talking about, but please don’t take responsibility for what I’m carrying.”

is that my heart Or is it the emotion that flows in? I don’t know. They are so jumbled together that you cannot tell them apart.

“Even if you get a different life, you get a different look, you remain the same.”

In the words of the old man’s various emotions, sadness, longing, apology, and warmth are entangled and soak me. Soaked in them, tears flowed from my eyes for no reason.

“Compared to an upright heart, the fact that there are many tears hasn’t changed either.”

The old man said so and wiped away my tears. His touch was warm and I missed him.

“Doing this reminds me of the old days. Would you listen to this old man for a moment?”

“I will listen.”

The old man’s smile faded.

“Thank you. So where to start? Yes, it would be good from there.”

Saying so, the old man tapped the ground lightly with the stick in his hand. Then the wind blew, and a halo of light enveloped us.

“I have lived for so many years, I have lost all passion and drive, and have been in deep despair. I saw a boy on such a fleeting day.”

The halo of light dissipated, and a young boy came into view. The boy distributed bread to what appeared to be outcasts. After distributing all the bread he was holding, a hungry sound rang out from the boy’s stomach as he returned carrying an empty envelope. Despite the ship’s clamor, the boy’s smile did not disappear.

“He was a fool who gave everything he had. It seemed stupid to act like that, so I watched it.”

The upright actions of the boy passed by, and the boy grew up and became a young man. A young man came out, and a group of monsters surrounding the village and a golem made of bones were seen.

“The day the person who shouldn’t have been born played a prank on the world. That prank reached where you live.”

An inaudible, tearing voice flowed from the mouth of the golem made of bones.

“If you sacrifice one person, I will spare the rest.”

At those words, the town became noisy. The cry that I shouldn’t be fooled by that word and the cry that everyone will die in a fight anyway, let’s be fooled once were entwined.

When the village became noisy, the person who had been helped by the boy pointed to the young boy and opened his mouth.

“Can’t you come forward? One of you can save them all.”

At those words, silence came to the village for a while, and it became noisy again.

Most of the words of criticism were about whether they had a conscience even after receiving such help, but their eyes did not. Even as she said so, she looked at the young man with ugliness in her eyes. Those eyes gathered and pushed the young man’s back.

The young man smiled at their eyes and opened his mouth.

“Everyone, don’t be too hard on yourself. He just eased my worries.”

At that, people sent words of concern, but no one stepped out on his behalf. Rather, their eyes were smiling, like those who had hoped that from the beginning. The sight was disgusting.

“Looking back, it’s disgusting. Because of such disgusting appearances, I have lost value in the world and have fallen into despair.”

The words of the old man, full of anger, dispersed, and a young man was seen walking in front of the golem.

“Are you a sacrifice?”

“That’s right.”

“Yes, your intentions were conveyed well.”

The golem’s torn voice ended, and the golem’s hand separated from its body and flew toward the village. The blown arm exploded with an ear-piercing noise, blood staining the sky.

“It’s meal time.”

After the Golem’s words ended, the monsters attacked the village. The young man shed tears as he saw the village where the quarrel was taking place.

“Why, why are you doing this! I even made a sacrifice.”

“It’s just for fun.”

The golem’s voice was different from before, not a tearing and unpleasant voice, but a woman’s voice mixed with laughter.

The voice cast despair on the young man’s face, and the golem’s red eyes stared at it as if savoring it.

The screams from the village stopped, and the golems and monsters disappeared. Left alone, the young man was crying as he looked at the village where no one was left.

“I made up my mind to sacrifice myself for the disgusting people, and it hurt to see their deaths. It was annoying and bothered me.”

A young man clad in blue light appeared in front of the crying young man.

“Why are you crying?”

The young man forced himself through the tears and opened his mouth.

“The fact that I survived, I am crying because I am disgusted with myself who thought I was lucky for a moment.”

“It is natural for humans.”

“Of course not. It shouldn’t be taken for granted.”

“You’re the only one who thinks so.”

“Still, my thoughts do not change.”

“So you’re going to live with your self-loathing?”

The young man nodded. Seeing this, the man let out a laugh.

“If that bitch resembled your personality even as much as a mouse tail, this kind of Satan wouldn’t have happened.”

“What does that mean?”

“It’s just a meaningless lament. Never mind.”

“How can you not care!”

The young man shouted and grabbed the man who was about to leave.

“Tell me who the woman is.”

“You know what?”

“If you continue to do these things, I will stop you.”

At those words, laughter erupted from the man’s mouth. The man laughed for a while and opened his mouth.

“If it had been dried, this would not have happened. It is just a misbegotten disaster.”

“I will do it anyway. I will use all means to dry it.”

“Even if you sacrifice everything?”

The young man, whose tears had stopped before he knew it, nodded his head with a firm expression.

“Then follow me.”

Saying that, the man stretched out his hand with a fishy smile. The young man took that hand, and the scenery dispersed.

“Do you know what I was thinking when I saw that boy?”

“I do not know.”

“I thought it would be a fun way to kill time.”

There was deep remorse and regret in the old man’s voice.

“That thought was wrong. It’s not just a pastime, it’s changed my whole life.”

The figure of a young man constantly training and the figure of a man pushing ahead quickly passed by. As the scenes passed by, the smile on the expressionless man’s face grew thicker.

“His foolish heart was terribly upright, and it permeated even me in my despair, and thanks to that I was able to get out of my soggy dejection.”

The scene that passed by quickly stopped, and I saw a young man covered in scars. The young man held a rugged sword and slashed monsters to protect people.

The people who were protected by the young man thanked him, and the young man opened his mouth with a smile.

“I just did what I was supposed to do.”

With those words, the scene dissipated, and the young man and man reappeared. The young man got down on one knee and thanked the man.

“Thanks to Master, I was able to find my way in life. Thank you very much.”

“It’s just that your upright heart has borne fruit.”

“Still, Master’s guidance remains the same.”

“That guy really makes people feel hot.”

The man said so, but a smile spread across his face.

“Master. Now that the fruit has been borne, isn’t it time for you to let me know your name as promised?”

“I made that promise too.”

“That’s right.”

“Okay, I promised, so I have to tell you. Kaian That is my name.”

Kian. Even though it’s the first time I’ve heard the name, it feels familiar and nostalgic.

I’m chewing on the name with that feeling. The scenery dispersed and returned to the original flower field.

“Do you know why I told you this story?”

I shook my head at the old man’s question.

“I guess so. Then don’t ask another question. What do you think the end of them would be like?”

To the old man’s question, I thought about their appearance. A young man who fell into self-loathing due to his terrible uprightness, but regained his smile by saving people. The man who laughed a lot while teaching such a young man, decided the answer to that figure.

“I think I would have lived happily.”

The old man put on a somewhat sad expression and shook his head.

“They both lived miserably.”

“Why is that?”

“It happened because they were both immature. Young men were inexperienced in working for themselves, and men were inexperienced in working for others. That has led to unhappiness.”

The old man looked at me while talking in a voice full of loneliness.

“That is why I am telling this story. Whatever life you live, live for yourself. If that is difficult, learn to let someone else carry your burden.”

Saying that, the old man pulled out a rusty sword stuck near the tombstone. Blue aura passed from the old man’s hand to the sword, and the rust disappeared. The rust-disappeared sword was crude, but it had a blue spirit. My heart was drawn to the shape of the sword.

The old man holding the sword tapped the ground with his cane. The ground the staff touched moved, and the roots of the trees rose. The tree roots that rose up wrapped around the sword and became the shape of a scabbard.

The old man held out the sword to me.

“It will be yours.”

I took the sword carefully and lost my eyes for a moment. The mind that had been temporarily enchanted by the sword returned, and when he raised his head to thank the old man, the old man was nowhere to be seen.

There was just a letter written in the place where the old man was.

“If the current situation is confusing, judge with your own eyes.”

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Looking at the place where the person who suddenly appeared and disappeared without a sound like the wind, I chewed on his words.