Is That My Alter Ego - Is That My Alter Ego chapter 36

36 – Monster

“…You can rest assured now. The dark wizards… we’ve taken care of all of them.”

“Thank you…! Thank you for saving us…!”

Erielle looked at Venice, comforting the citizens who had been kidnapped by the dark wizards and barely escaped.

The citizens shed tears and bowed continuously to him. Venice offered them warm gestures and comforted them.

‘Interesting.’

Interest. And a bit of curiosity. That was the emotion that arose in Erielle as she looked at Venice.

Discovering such an intriguing thing, how long has it been?

Since childhood. Past the time when proper thinking was impossible, around the time self-reflection became possible.

The girl who loved everything and found everything interesting disappeared. Only apathy and emptiness remained.

I don’t know why it happened like that. At some point… Whatever it was, the interest disappeared, and emotions themselves seemed to vanish.

The world, once vibrant, turned monochrome, and I even forgot what I wanted to do.

Magic. In the monochrome world, it was like a small, shining light. I seemed to have a talent for magic far beyond others, succeeding in whatever I wished for.

The forgotten emotion of ‘interest’ began to faintly resurface.

In childhood, unable to find interest in anything, when I became interested in magic, my father appointed a magic instructor for me.

“Oh my…! With this amount of mana…! You could become an outstanding magician!”

The day I first met the magic instructor. I recall the instructor who trembled with excitement upon seeing me. Like discovering a precious gem, exhaling with enthusiasm.

…Is that all you think my magical power amounts to?

Even without being taught or informed, I naturally learned how to condense mana. Like time flowing and the sun rising before the moon appears.

And that self-proclaimed exceptional magic instructor couldn’t even grasp my true mana capacity.

“This… this is… unbelievable…”

The day of our second meeting. Even though I only unleashed a fraction of my magic power, the magic instructor broke out in a cold sweat. It was quite amusing to see him struggling to breathe properly.

“Whew… trying this magic…?”

Sizzle!

“This might be a bit difficult…!”

Clang!

“….This…!”

Whispering Decay.

Still, it wasn’t that I gained nothing from the magic instructor. The magic he showed me once became a part of my knowledge.

-….I’m sorry. I simply can’t… handle it.

On the day of our third meeting, the magic instructor left instead. His last gaze upon me was as if…

he was looking at a monster, his eyes filled with fear.

Afterwards, my father tried many times to find a new magic instructor, but all were refused. It seems the first instructor I met was a more exceptional magician than I thought.

Probably my reputation had spread, making others hesitant too.

‘It doesn’t matter.’

So what if I don’t have an instructor? I can learn on my own. In fact, exploring magic by myself was much more helpful.

…It was helpful. It’s just that even the few who were by my side ended up leaving.

It seems I actually enjoyed my time with the magic instructors. To me, who never had friends since childhood, even they seemed like a source of comfort.

…The persistent heaviness gnawing at my heart doesn’t seem to disappear.

After that. As time passed and years went by, my magical power grew increasingly vast. Without careful condensation, the sheer intimidation of my mana made it hard for ordinary people to even breathe comfortably.

“…Cut.”

Slice-!

Boom-! Rumble…

In the middle of a mountain behind the house, there was a huge boulder that seemed impossible for dozens of men to lift. With just a gesture of my hand, the rock split in half.

In mock battles with those called great magicians, or in contests of magic power against those who claim to be archmages. I was always the one looking down.

Even those who I had to look up to in my childhood, ended up scurrying around at my feet.

“…………”

I inadvertently looked at my hand. Cold… A pale hand exuding chilliness.

….The hand of a monster.

And the emptiness and loneliness felt throughout my body. That, only growing stronger as time passed.

Unbearably tingling… And cold. A feeling I’ve felt all my life yet never quite accustomed to.

Now, there was no sorcerer superior to me in the Northern Territory.

“No… fun.”

The day I truly became a monster, even my last remaining interest faded away.

As the last remaining color vanished, I became impurity expelled from a splendid world.

Splash-! Gurgling..

Plunging into the sea, the sensation of being thrust into an endless abyss. No matter how much I struggled, there was no one to acknowledge this solitary space.

Endless darkness where I couldn’t tell if I was rising or sinking.

My emotions sink into a bottomless pit. Endlessly, gradually fading away… 

And so, meaningless time flowed incessantly. Living without realizing time passing, unable to die.

“…Damn black sorcerers. Another victim.”

One day, while passing through the castle corridor, I happened to hear Kyle Oraburne’s voice filled with anger.

Black sorcerers. They began to appear, kidnapping and torturing innocent people.

They were like bugs, even killing.

I heard there were black sorcerers found in our Frost Territory too? But it seemed they hadn’t been caught yet.

‘Black sorcerers…’

That night. The bright light of the castle faded, the time when everyone was asleep.

I wore the dull black robe, long forgotten in the closet, as if entranced. Additionally, I put on the crow mask used in my childhood masquerades.

“….Ridiculous.”

Reflected in the full-length mirror, my appearance was comically absurd. Nevertheless, it was enough.

I quietly opened the window, thrust my body outward, and headed towards the Frost Territory. The destination was where the dark sorcerer resided.

The overflowing magical energy made my body run faster than a carriage, and in an instant, I reached the Frost Territory.

“………..”

Holding onto the robe fluttering in the strong wind, I perched on the roof of a random house, overlooking the Frost Territory.

It was late at night, a time when everyone was asleep. Except for the occasional patrolling guards, there was no sign of human presence.

“……….?”

In the midst of this, I saw someone in a black robe far away, carrying a bag that seemed to contain something alive, skillfully avoiding the gaze of the guards and heading somewhere.

‘….Found you.’

Jumping between rooftops, moving silently to the point where even footsteps were inaudible, I quickly reached the house where the dark sorcerer had entered.

Squeak…

“You…what are you!!”

“Ugh…uhh…!!”

“….Hmm.”

As I opened the door and entered the house, I pulled out a person whose hands, feet, and mouth were bound from the bag. I met eyes with the dark sorcerer who was about to go somewhere.

The person with bound limbs shed tears and shouted with all their might. However, it was barely audible, muffled by the cloth.

“Y-you…you monster!!”

Swish-!

In the hands of the dark sorcerer, an unknown black thorn emerged and began to assail towards me.

In cases of mana-based magical attacks, there usually remains a trace or path. However, inexplicably, I couldn’t even detect this attack.

Crack!

Anticipating that I wouldn’t witness a pleasant scene if subjected to that attack, I evaded. The thorn flew and embedded itself in a corner of the wall.

“Hmm. So, this is dark magic…”

“What are you saying..! I’ll…!”

“…Sever.”

Whoosh!

No longer wanting to hear the insect babble, I closed its mouth.

Dark magic is… somewhat fascinating. Still, I don’t want to end up like that bug.

“As for other victims.”

“I…I don’t know… Please, spare me…”

“…Hmm. I didn’t intend to kill you.”

Leaving the trembling person behind, I surveyed the room. Perhaps this victim was the last; there was nothing peculiar to be found.

“Report to the guards. They’ll take care of it.”

“Yes…yes, thank you…!”

Leaving the person who seemed on the verge of fainting, I returned home. As if nothing had happened, the castle remained quiet.

“…Dark sorcerer.”

Bugs that nibble away at the world, creatures that must be killed. Rather than doing nothing… should I at least crush a few bugs?

After that, during daylight, I portrayed the serene northern duchess, and when the moon rose, I went about assassinating dark sorcerers.

“Miss Ariel? Can you take a look at this?”

“….Hm? What the……ugh!”

“Ugh…hahahahaha… Finally did it…! It was tough working under those damned bastards!!”

Then, one night, a butler who approached me, or rather, who used to be a butler, did something to me that left me unable to move any magic.

“Just close your eyes for a moment… heh heh!”

“You son of a…!”

After that. My memory is hazy. When I came to, I found myself trapped in a cage, subjected to horrific torture every day.

“Giggle… Shall we see if you’re worthy to be the master’s vessel?!”

“Argh…aaaHH-!”

Pains beyond description. Feeling like my insides were being torn apart, and headaches as if my head was being struck multiple times.

When they inserted a needle and injected something, I felt a burning pain from inside my body.

Every day. I was tortured. No matter how much I screamed, begged for my life.

I called out the names of my father, mother, and brothers, but no one came to find me.

Days passed. My throat hoarse from endless screaming, my vision blurry and barely visible.

At that time, I think I had given up on life. I felt no hope at all, and even the pain that had been overwhelming my body was no longer felt.

From Noble mtl dot com

My hand, which was clinging to the edge of a cliff, began to slip. Slipping more and more.

My body tries to fall into the endless darkness.

Even though it was painful, even though it was hard, as the strength slipped from my grip, I fell. Down to the bottom of an abyss where no one would find me.

And then… I would slowly be forgotten.

…I want to live.

I thought I had given up on everything. But as the final moments of my life approached, the irony of wanting to live made me laugh.

Neither my father. Nor my mother. Nor my brothers could find me.

Now, the only one who could find me…

Thud-

Just then, I clearly saw through my blurred vision a man firmly grasping my falling hand, as if he couldn’t bear to let it go.

His black hair tied up carelessly. And eyes like red roses.

The total amount of magic he possessed seemed utterly ordinary, and he did not appear to be a trained body.

Thump-

However, he was an ex-butler. No, he dispatched a dark wizard in a single breath. It was hard to see clearly because of my blurred vision.

After slaying the dark wizard, he began to exert himself to save me.

…Can I trust you? We don’t even know each other.

Might I harm you?

“You don’t seem like you would, do you?” he replied to my question, smiling as if it were obvious, pulling me to safety.

“Venice. My name is Venice.”

Venice. He introduced himself as Venice.

‘…How strange.’

Why am I, undoubtedly seeing you for the first time, so intrigued by you?

For the first time in years, since the magic, a sliver of color began to seep back into my world. At the same time, I, who had been exiled, returned to the ordinary world.

Strange. And intriguing.

How did he grasp the sorcery of the dark magician, claiming to be ordinary yet fighting so skillfully?

Why was I the one attacked by the dark magician instead?

I’m curious about everything.

“Little friends, would you like to make a promise with me?”

“Sob… What promise…?”

“… About today’s events. Not telling anyone. Can you agree to that?”

“But… then no one will recognize you, sir.”

“It’s okay. Let’s do it like this then.”

-An entrusted secret mission for the aspiring hero!

With a finger on the child’s forehead and a thumb on the child’s lips, the child vigorously nodded, then departed with the adults.

“….Ha. They’re not even kids.”

…Normally, it would have been considered childish and ignored.

Why does it suddenly spark more interest?

I still don’t know anything about you. What actions you take, what thoughts you have.

So… I’ll find out. Everything about you.

Gazing at the small miracle that came after years, Ariel’s lifeless violet eyes began to shine brightly.

***

Shiver..

‘…Oh. Suddenly, what a chill…’

Because of the cold weather, perhaps. I felt an unfamiliar chill.