My Ex-Girlfriend Regrets Dumping Me - My Ex-Girlfriend Regrets Dumping Me chapter 4

4 – Empty Farewell (4)

Time flew by without mercy, and before we knew it, it was our third year of middle school.

For some reason, Ha-yeon came to my room holding contact lenses and glasses.

“How about this? Isn’t this better than glasses?”

“Well, it kind of seems like it…”

“Hey, stop looking at your phone and look at my face! Which one is better?”

“Alright. Why are you getting mad? I’ll look. I’ll look.”

Interrupting my intense concentration on the mobile game, Ha-yeon put on and took off the glasses, then asked me for an evaluation.

Feeling lazy, I replied casually.

“…Both are fine.”

Honestly, whether it was glasses or contact lenses, Ha-yeon was just Ha-yeon to me.

Ha-yeon looked frustrated and asked again.

“Ugh… Then if you had to choose just one, which would it be?”

“If I had to choose, maybe the lenses are better?”

“Really? Got it.”

As I said that, Hayeon folded her glasses and neatly put them in the storage box.

“But, Yura. Are you really going to react like that?”

“No. I said I’ll watch after finishing this round.”

“…The game is more important than me, huh? Whatever.”

I wonder if my indifferent reaction upset her.

Hayeon expressed her emotions that she usually didn’t show, murmuring softly.

“Sigh… I’m doing all this for someone’s sake… Really.”

Of course, her voice was drowned out by the game sound and barely audible.

.

.

.

.

But still, it seemed like we had a mutual understanding.

Hayeon, without glasses, became even more beautiful, gaining much popularity at school.

However, approaching her, who had no expression and spoke less, was not easy, and Hayeon didn’t actively try to make more friends apart from me.

They say if you want to knock down a long-lived tree, aim for its roots.

Children who wanted to become friends with Hayeon gradually approached me, who was close to Hayeon.

Perhaps, my growth being stunted after middle school and my ordinary appearance played a part as well.

Unlike Hayeon, I grew taller and transformed into an ordinary-looking person.

In my opinion, my personality was also quite flexible and accommodating.

Maybe it was because I had been taking care of Hayeon since we were young.

Anyway, maybe I was an easier target than Hayeon for them.

So, thanks to that, I had quite a few friends in class.

“…So, what’s the real relationship between you two?”

“Yeah, honestly, I was curious. Why is Hayeon only close to you?”

During gym class, while sitting on the bleachers to take a break, kids gathered around.

When there was spare time like this, such conversations occasionally arose.

Seemingly, Hayeon, who stood out in the class due to her unique appearance, was everyone’s interest.

Not just boys, but many girls also wanted to be friends with Hayeon.

To them, Hayan and I must have been an interesting gossip.

“And sometimes, I caught you staring at me absentmindedly. You know?”

“Really? Oh my! There might be something after all. Between the two of us?”

Every time, my response was always the same.

“What should I say… We’re just old friends. That’s all.”

Although it may not have been the answer they wanted, it was the truth.

It was clear that our relationship was closer than with other kids, but I still thought of it as being only friends.

I never deeply pondered about relationships back in middle school.

“Is that all? Really?”

“I don’t think so… do you?”

“Ohhh. Yoon Gun-yul, tell me the truth! Don’t lie.”

But I didn’t want to reveal Hayan and my personal lives.

There was no point in telling anyone; it wouldn’t benefit anyone.

In order to silence the criticisms and doubts pouring down on us, I had no choice but to repeat the same words loudly.

“Hayan and I are just friends. Friends. There’s nothing more to it. Let’s stop talking about this now.”

“…Ugh.”

As I said that, the kids seemed to give up digging any further.

It was a resigned atmosphere, as if they realized there would be no more answers even if they pried.

In the moment when I tried to let out a sigh, it wasn’t Hayan walking down from behind the stand.

“…Yul-ah, what did you just say?”

Once Hayan, who was the center of attention, appeared, the kids fell silent.

She was approaching me with a chilling expression on her face.

“What did you say just now?”

A somewhat sinister gaze.

Whenever Hayan had this look, it meant she was quite angry.

I didn’t know why Hayan was mad, but I thought it would be best not to provoke her now, so I simply repeated her words.

“I just said we’re just friends.”

“Just friends?”

Hayan’s eyebrows raised sharply.

It meant that I felt very uneasy.

I had just tried to find out where I had made a mistake in what I said, but I couldn’t figure it out at all.

“Why? What’s wrong?”

“…Are we just friends?”

“Then we’re not?”

…I didn’t know exactly what it was, but something big had happened.

As I worried about what kind of aftermath would come when we were alone at home, I trembled inwardly.

Hayan had a tendency to sulk and be very stubborn, which made it annoying to comfort her.

*Squeeze.*

I could feel the soft and warm sensation on my thigh.

Hayan, who was wearing sports clothes, a small figure, slipped into my arms.

Very naturally.

“What, what is it? Suddenly?”

I froze with Hayan’s abrupt action.

The other kids watched us as if they were watching a drama, making “ooh” sounds.

Still, Hayan pulled me closer and hugged herself.

“…Even so, are we just friends?”

“You…you…what are you doing?”

Facing me like that, Hayan asked a question I didn’t know how to answer.

I just lowered my head in embarrassment from the gazes gathering around us.

Her face was as shameless as usual, but her reddened ears couldn’t be hidden.

She quickly escaped from my embrace and ran behind the stands.

I blankly stared at her retreating figure.

“Why are you acting like that? Suddenly.”

Feeling my heart pounding rapidly, as if it was after exercise.

I realized for the first time that we were not just friends.

At least not for Hayan.

*

However, this didn’t lead to a drastic development in our relationship.

Hayan simply continued the physical affection with me more naturally, and I didn’t refuse it.

Sometimes, I’d be the first to hold her hand.

I didn’t dislike Hayeon either.

Because we had time together, maybe it wasn’t such a strange thing to like each other.

We understood each other best.

I didn’t think it was an ordinary relationship.

Like the ambiguous relationships in dramas or movies.

We couldn’t say we were dating yet, but we had time to know we liked each other.

Maybe we were a little scared of each other. We couldn’t afford to lose our friendship.

For both me and Hayeon, we were in a relationship that was now hard to separate from life.

So that’s how we became freshmen in high school.

“Hey, Seo Hayeon! Let’s go together. Together.”

“No, I don’t want to.”

“Why are you sulking again? You should at least tell me.”

Starting her way home with quick steps, Hayeon left me behind.

I quickly changed my shoes and ran after Hayeon.

Entering high school made the distinction between genders even clearer, and Hayeon often sulked at me like this.

Perhaps because of her honest nature, Hayeon didn’t tell me the reason directly.

So when she sulked like this, I had to be the one to figure it out.

“…Just continue living without knowing for a lifetime, if you don’t know?”

“Why are you making me so hurt with your words.”

When I gently took Hayeon’s hand, she reluctantly took mine as well.

This was also one of the skills I developed while being with her.

Whenever I held her hand, Hayeon seemed to easily let go of her anger.

“Sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong, but I’m sorry for now.”

When I apologized to Hayeon, she sighed and began to complain about what was bothering her.

“Oh… I try not to talk to other guys thinking about you.”

“…”

“…Can’t you not hang out with Yuna? She keeps sending subtle glances your way.”

“No. I’m the class president, how can I not talk to the vice president.”

“You were giggling during the group project.”

“Then we can’t work on our group project while being mad. We should still do it with a happy heart.”

The reason why she was mad at me was mostly simple.

Most of it was because she was jealous of me being close with other girls.

The problem was that she reacted sensitively to things that were so trivial that I hadn’t even considered them.

But eventually, in order to do what she wanted, there had to be a reason.

We were still just friends.

“…Are you jealous when I’m close with other girls?”

“Yeah. I get in a bad mood all day. Don’t you?”

“I guess I do.”

As I imagined Hayeon being close with another guy, my stomach turned.

…There must be only one solution in the end.

It was no longer something to procrastinate.

Perhaps it was something that someone should have said already.

“Hayeon. Let’s date then.”

“…”

“You were thinking of saying it anyway… you need a reason to keep a distance from other girls… anyway.”

Hyeon stopped in place at my words.

She stared at me intently with her widened, round eyes.

…Could it be a yes?

Hyeon’s lips, which didn’t seem to open at all.

Even though I knew she liked me, I felt strangely anxious.

It felt like the world was passing by in slow motion until her lips finally moved.

“…Just say it already. How long are you going to make me wait? Seriously.”

Hyeon brushed her hair behind her ear with a red cheek.

Despite the shaky gaze, her blunt words came out of her mouth.

“Sigh.”

Unintentionally, I burst into laughter, and that’s how we started dating that day.

*

So, I dated Hayeon and five years passed.

Enduring the difficult life of preparing for exams together, we supported each other.

As we entered the same university, we became quite a famous couple on campus.

We were always together, and our affection for each other deepened as time went by, rather than fading away.

“You’ve never fought before? Seriously, does that even make sense?”

“Yeah. We didn’t really have any reason to fight.”

“It’s like you guys were made for each other. My girlfriend and I argue all the time.”

During a conversation with friends where we drank in college, I felt something.

Although there were days when Ha-yeon or I got annoyed at each other occasionally, it was strange that we had never fought in the five years we dated.

I also believed that she and I had a destined connection.

So even when I received my military conscription notice, she didn’t waver.

“So when are you going to the army?”

“Hmm. Probably after sophomore year? That’s when most people go.”

“…So it’s not long now.”

Ha-yeon took my hand with a disappointed expression on her face.

And she buried her face into my chest, nuzzling her head against me.

It was what she did when she felt down.

I really liked Ha-yeon, and I didn’t want to break up like this, so without shame, I asked her.

“…Will you wait for me?”

“Yes. Of course. I can’t live without you, Yoon Geon-yul.”

Ha-yeon replied without any hesitation.

Then she made her hand into a clamp and grasped my cheek, shaking it as she asked.

“Can you live without me?”

“No. I absolutely can’t.”

“That settles it then. Don’t worry, I’ll wait for you no matter what happens.”

That way, we smiled at each other, bursting into laughter.

I was so grateful to her, and for the remaining time, I tried my best to treat her even better.

.

.

.

.

A franchise café near school.

We were all in university and living on our own, and since we were also studying different majors, we had to make time to see each other on purpose.

So we had a lot of days where we went on dates like this every week.

We thought about living together too, but we couldn’t find a suitable two-room apartment, so it was best to find rooms nearby as much as possible.

“Yura. I’m going for a health checkup this weekend.”

“Really? All of a sudden? You haven’t even done it before.”

I took a sip of my iced Americano, swallowed it, and asked her.

“I don’t know. My aunt’s company is doing it for me? She keeps asking me to go because it’s a waste of money.”

A health checkup provided by the major company Harien’s aunt worked for.

I didn’t think much of it.

Harien hadn’t had any health problems yet.

There seemed to be no problem with her health, at least superficially.

“Yeah? Good. Get checked thoroughly this time.”

…But after that day, Harien’s appearance began to change little by little.

Very strangely.