Rockstar Again - Chapter 162



Only Noblemtl

Episode 162. Inspiration is filled with many things (1)

For pros, the off-season is a time of preparation.

My dad, that is, my real dad, not Beomseok, never had an off-season.

Um… … isn’t it?

Swaaa …

-It’s raining… …!

like that.

When I hear the sound of rain in the morning, I jump out of bed in happiness.

It was a rainy day, and my father, who was a carpenter, had a day off.

It’s easy to say that it’s just hard work, but what’s easy about feeding a family?

On days when it rained heavily and my dad didn’t go to work, I would go next to him and rub my body against him.

-Dad. Lie down. I’ll rub you.

-You’re tickling me, again.

-Okay, lie down.

Then, just in case, my dad lay down on the living room floor with his work clothes already on.

I squeezed my dad hard.

Year after year.

Every summer, it rains.

As the rainy season continues.

My hands that were stroking my dad grew bigger.

-You’re quite strong.

-Have you grown a lot?

-……I know.

That’s why I liked rain so much.

I liked the rainy season better… … .

Because when I opened my eyes in the morning, my dad was there, and when I came home from school, my dad was there.

however…….

-Fortunately, there hasn’t been much rain this year.

―… … The weather is so bad.

-That’s a curse, isn’t it?

-secret.

Whenever I grumbled like that, my father would pat my head, which had grown bigger than his, and leave the house.

1994, the last summer I spent with my dad, was extremely hot.

The rainy season was unusually short.

My father, who was the eldest, had to work, so he hated rainy days.

I hated sunny days because I couldn’t be with my dad.

The summer of 1994… … remains so faintly in my memory.

Of course… … I don’t plan on blaming the weather. At that time, I was also preparing my debut album with my hyungs.

At night, in Itaewon and Jongno.

Because I’m busy performing and practicing, I mostly just sleep at home.

It’s a combination of many things.

If I had known that this would be my last summer with my dad, I would have gone up to the rooftop at dawn and sprayed water with a hose for hours.

So that Dad doesn’t have to go to work because he thinks it’s going to rain.

“Are you having a snowball fight with the sun?”

Beomseok’s voice pulls me out of old memories.

I looked up at the clear sky, took off my sunglasses, and looked at Beomseok.

“A bald eagle with no artistic sense, who interferes with the artist’s recollection.”

“Reminiscence is bullshit. If you look at the sun like that with sunglasses on, it’s bad for your eyes.”

“Are you worried or are you swearing? Just say one thing.”

“Then I’ll just swear.”

“That would be better.”

Didn’t you say there are some guys who are funny just by looking at each other’s faces?

That’s the two of us.

We just laughed like idiots.

“Don’t laugh, you look like X.”

“Do your fans know that your condition is abnormal?”

“Shouldn’t you know by now?”

After the fan signing event two weeks ago.

Because the aftertaste didn’t go away, I checked out the community and SNS for a while.

But the fans’ reaction was a bit like that.

[But Dong-ha definitely doesn’t seem normal?]

[Wouldn’t it be stranger if the person who wrote and composed all the songs on the album had a similar train of thought to the average person? Their emotions are different.]

[Emotions… … Well… … If you say it like that, I have nothing to say. It’s just that… … the kid is a bit abnormal.]

[My cousin’s 8th cousin’s friend works at a broadcasting station, and Dong-ha oppa is already famous. He’s abnormal, but he’s the kindest person. He’s kind, but he pretends not to be kind, which is hilarious.]

Well, there are a lot of posts from my fans, so I see it in a positive light… … but both Pawa and Kka have the same opinions.

In the end, what I’m saying is that I’m abnormal.

Well, the fans know that too.

How nice it would be if I didn’t have to try so hard to pretend to be normal.

“Stop standing and looking at the sun and walk. It’s hot, so stop fooling around.”

Beomseok’s words stimulate me.

This is like asking someone to please play a prank on you.

“You, bow your head and look at the floor.”

“Why? What the hell are you trying to say again?”

“Let’s see if the sunlight reflects off the tree and sets it on fire. Quickly.”

“You fucking punk… …! Are you really going to die?”

also.

Our dog needs to bark to be happy.

Anyway, whatever.

I’m climbing the steep slope side by side with Beomseok.

Admiring the unusually clear and clean clouds.

“But aren’t you dating?”

When Beomseok suddenly asked again, this time I got angry.

“Why do you date alone? Am I a hermaphrodite?”

“If I had your face, I’d be dating about ten people at the same time. Your personality is the problem.”

“… …Shut up. This is all because of you guys.”

“You guys always make excuses.”

“I’m telling you, it’s true. You guys must smell. The girls won’t come near you.”

“This kid… … This guy is really evil… … . Can I just say that when my brothers aren’t here?”

To Beomseok’s words, I answered confidently.

“Okay. I do it in front too.”

“… … Really… … Ha… … .”

“What, what?”

“no…….”

Beomseok pretends to be an adult and silently walks forward.

Why is that so funny?

Perhaps, the dark insides of that bald eagle, who is a member of the social elite, an intellectual, and of a fairly old age.

I think I figured it out.

“Bald eagle.”

“… … .”

“A walking natural disaster.”

“don’t do it.”

“Self-inflammating arsonist.”

“I told you to stop?”

“… … .”

Even though I stopped, Beomseok suddenly turned around and made a face.

The most important thing when teasing someone is the timing of your departure. If you get the timing wrong, it’s very likely that a fight will break out.

I smiled brightly at Beomseok.

Then, Beomseok, who was looking down at the anger and lost his timing, let out a deep sigh.

“Oh my… … Just hurry up and start working on your second album. That’ll make you feel better.”

“I’m preparing hard. And I’m just making music every day. I have to fill it up before I can pour it out again.”

“Is teasing me filling you up?”

“It’s incredibly filling. It’s fun.”

“I’m not happy at all.”

“I am happy.”

Phew— I barely managed to hold back my laughter as I walked with Beomseok again.

This is why friends are good.

On clear days, there are times when I suddenly feel down.

It reminds me of the summer of 1994.

Today was just that kind of day, but being with Beomseok made it so much fun.

‘… … But I still miss Dad.’

I picked up a branch and swung it around.

It feels good in the hand and is quite fun to swing.

When I stir up weeds and grass on the mountain with it, it reminds me of when I was young.

In the end, I guess I have to say that these things are recharging me one by one.

Reminiscing about old memories and feeling nostalgic.

Thinking back to that time when I couldn’t go back.

I also like to change my mood by joking around with my friends.

Sometimes I feel sad on a clear day.

“Are you ready for the second album?”

Beomseok suddenly asked again.

When I see things like this, I can tell that this kid really enjoys being taken advantage of.

If you just stay still, I’ll stay still too. But if you look at it, you’re the first to speak up when you feel like it’s quiet.

“Almost? Just fill in three or four songs and we’ll have a double album. But that’s not going so well.”

“You even know how to whine. I always thought you were just a brat.”

“If you’re filling up a double album in a month, you can complain a little. Oh, and this time, there are two songs written by Taejoo hyung?”

“really?”

“Oh. If the response is better than what I wrote, I’ll take it out of the show.”

At my words, Beomseok narrowed his eyes and looked at me.

“Why? What? Why are your eyes open like that?”

“Are you kidding me?”

“No?”

“This guy is crazy.”

“I’m the leader. I do whatever I want.”

I didn’t bother to correct him, saying it was a joke.

It’s not like Beomseok or Nana, it’s not like that.

It would be good if the song written by Taejoo hyung did better.

If it leads us to a bigger stage, Taejoo hyung can walk ahead of me.

But it’s embarrassing to say something like that out loud.

When it’s soft and fluffy, if the snout is light, it’s like kicking the blanket from behind.

In front of my father’s grave, where I had arrived, I sprayed alcohol in a pose that had become quite familiar to me.

“Dad, your seat is clean.”

“Because I come and manage it periodically.”

Beomseok answered my words.

There are only two of us here anyway. It would be a bit scary if someone else answered.

I was about to say, “I guess Dong-ha’s grave is also being managed,” but I held back.

He probably takes care of his son Dong-ha’s grave while also doing other things. That doesn’t mean he isn’t grateful to Beom-seok.

I just thought that he lived a really tough life.

“thanks.”

“… … What are you going to say next, thank you, Rae?”

“I just said thank you because I was grateful.”

“… … Let’s stop there. It’s giving me goosebumps.”

“Isn’t it an eagle’s scorpion? Since they’re the same species, I wonder if the feeling is similar?”

“… … .”

I made a few pointless jokes and bowed to the grave.

That’s how it came down.

I thought that was the end.

Now that it’s the off-season, I’m filling up on the inspiration I poured out while making songs.

Pour, pour, pour.

As soon as Beomseok gets into the car, his cell phone rings.

It felt strange.

“What are you doing that you don’t accept? If you’re the devil hag, aren’t you the representative of the Savior Spirit?”

“… … .”

Even after Beomseok’s urging, I was still silent for a long time, and then I finally picked up the phone when the call came again.

“hello.”

-Dong-ha, what are you doing?

“Just what? Filling it up?”

-Can I see you for a moment? Do you want to come to the company? Or should I come to where you are?

“Why is your voice so warm? You sound a little scary today. I don’t feel better. Speak softly like you usually do.”

Even though I was joking, there was no response from the Savior on the other end of the phone.

There is only a brief moment of silence.

-Let me see your face.

“no, I do not want.”

―… … Look. I have something to tell you.

“I told you I don’t like it?”

-Stop acting like a kid. You really have something to say, right?

Beomseok was giving me a lot of looks, asking me what I was talking about on the phone.

What should I say… … .

There is something like that.

It’s like Beomseok saying, it gives me goosebumps. Something like… …a premonition.

I heard that for no reason.

Isn’t it because there is no reason?

It was just a bit like that today.

It’s particularly clear, so it brings back old memories.

That was kind of… … a direction that was bringing me down.

If you don’t answer the phone the first time, the Savior will wait for a while. The same goes for calls that come right away.

Anyway… … So I had a really X-like feeling.

“Just tell me now.”

-Look at my face. I have to say it after seeing you.

“Are you going to confess your love?”

―… … That’s not it. A little. Be serious when you’re serious. Okay?

I paused for a moment and then answered.

“Yes, okay. Come to where I am. I’ll give you an hour. If you come within that time, I’ll listen to you.”

-Send me a text message with the location. I’ll be there.

I was frozen like ice for a long time, holding the dead cell phone.

“What are you doing? Why are you answering the phone like that?”

“Huh? Uh… … It was just… … ? For some reason, it felt really dirty.”

“Crazy. When the representative of the old world tells you that you’re pretty, do well. There’s no one like that.”

“I didn’t do that because I saw the witch… … . Oh… … What the hell. Why are you suddenly like this?”

My legs were trembling with an unknown premonition.

Something… … made me feel uneasy.

In my stead, Beomseok told Gu Seolyeong where to meet.

Gu Seol-ryeong arrived here with Secretary Hong Seon-ah’s older sister in exactly 50 minutes.

In front of an old supermarket in a rural village where my father’s grave is located.

Rockstar Again Episode 163