Rockstar Again - Chapter 53



Only Noblemtl

Episode 53. Rapunzel (7)

“The weather is nice.”

The old man rolled down his car window a little and snorted without realizing it.

“What’s the weather like today? It seems quite chilly.”

“That’s right. That’s why the weather is nice.”

A fairly bitter wind for autumn blew through the slightly open gap and tickled the tip of Gu Seol-ryeong’s nose.

‘I don’t think I originally liked the cold.’

The term ‘original’ is quite ambiguous in terms of what constitutes a standard for something.

Although it is used interchangeably with the meaning of first, strictly speaking, first and original are different.

If the beginning is a specific point, the original is fluid.

One person’s originality may be another person’s change. Because only the person himself knows when the originality actually means the original.

The Savior closed his eyes, feeling the wind.

Inside the car, it rolls quite smoothly.

A cold wind from the gap.

The two ingredients mixed together brought back the most original memories that the Savior could remember.

* * *

At that time… … I don’t remember exactly, but judging by the cold wind blowing and the fact that I was walking around hunched over despite my thin clothes, it must have been early fall.

I have a strong memory of saying that I was five years old, so I would have been around that age. Of course, childhood memories are not always accurate, so I can’t be sure that I was exactly five years old.

therefore.

Early fall, around 1994 or 1995.

“The child is pretty.”

The woman smiled softly as she looked at the child.

And then, behind a man and a woman who appeared to be a couple, the orphanage director opened her mouth as if showing off her belongings.

“Isn’t she pretty? She’s the best in our orphanage.”

“How old are you?”

“Two years old.”

“Then how many months? He’s a little big for a two-year-old.”

“It’s good because they’ll be tall when they grow up. We take care of their nutrition, so they’re a bit tall. But they’re actually stronger and better. Compared to small children.”

The child, with big eyes and pale, almost white skin, looked at the aunt and uncle who were examining him along with the director.

It took me a while to look up, but I finally made eye contact.

“Oh my. Look at her. How can her eyes be so pretty? She looks like a doll.”

And laugh.

Because this child knew that the other person would like him more if he did so.

“You have a pretty smile, little one. What’s your name?”

“I don’t have a name. And I’m not two years old. I’m five years old.”

“What? How old are you?”

“Five years old.”

The child proudly held out his hand with five fingers spread out.

It was meant to look good, but it had the opposite effect. The lady who had been smiling the whole time glared at the director with a cold face.

“Didn’t you just say she was two years old? And why doesn’t the child have a name? Isn’t that abusive or something?”

“Because the child is still young… … It seems like he’s confused about his age. Haha… … .”

“Who do you think is stupid? A two-year-old is talking so clearly? You look like you’re six or seven, not five. What are you talking about!”

As the old man and woman got angry and left, the director started to run wild, took off the pretty clothes he had made for the child, and threw them into the crowd of children.

“If you talk about her, hit her! She needs to look young to sell well! No matter how pretty she is, who would take her when she’s all grown up? She’ll be six years old by the end of the year. Then she won’t be able to sell at a fair price! Give her a little more food, too. What does she eat to keep growing? And cut her hair short. I want her to stop looking like a big girl. Do you understand?”

In the darkness of darkness.

Not even knowing your own name.

Still, the child, who was quite quick-witted, had to swallow her tears.

Because I learned through my body and senses that if I cry, a scary old man will come and hit me.

Although he showed off all his skills to escape this pitch-black darkness, it seemed to have the opposite effect, as the adults who visited the orphanage always took a different child.

He said the child seemed too big.

It seems like the child is already thinking and remembering.

One day, those memories were piling up along with the cold wind.

“I can tell at a glance. You know… … .”

A man who looked very young for an old man came and hugged the child and cried.

‘Why are you doing this?’

‘Will this man get me out?’

‘I want to look good.’

‘Then I guess I shouldn’t say anything.’

Another child who learned something kept his mouth shut.

“The girl’s hair… why is it such a mess?”

“Do you know what your name is?”

“Do you remember when you came here?”

“Have you eaten?”

“Ma’am… … No, do you remember Mom’s face?”

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Where is the child with the mother here?

Even though it’s difficult, I know what I need to know.

I know better by sight.

You will know after just a week of admission that this is a place where orphaned children gather.

“Let’s go with Oppa. We’ll have to get tested, but… … You’re right. I know. You and the lady. You really look alike.”

What did the young man who called himself his older brother do to the orphanage director who asked if he had money?

“Please take care of it. I have to take care of the paperwork. Please pay the balance then!”

I let go of the director’s hand, who greeted me brightly, and took the hand of the young man who called me brother, and left the orphanage that was my whole world.

and.

“Brother, there’s something I have to do. You’re still young, so you might not understand, but… …Brother, um… … Talk to Mom and Dad, and I’ll take you home. I’ll definitely take you home… … Just wait a few days.”

The child held on tightly to the trouser leg of the young man who was about to leave.

With all my might.

“I’ll definitely come get you. Adults need proof… … and time. To me, you’re just my little brother… … , but to Mom… … time… … I really… … need… … .”

The young man, who was hugging the child tightly, looked at a man whose hair was longer than that of the woman.

And I thought the child couldn’t speak or understand, so I poured out my heart without holding back.

“Tae-ju. There’s no one else I can ask of you. I have to do a paternity test with my dad and this kid. I also have to convince my mom. I was thinking of taking care of it and bringing her here, but I just couldn’t leave her there. Anyone can see that she’s that lady’s daughter. Anyone can see that she’s my sister. I can’t leave her there while waiting for the evidence.”

From that day on, I started hanging out with my brother who had long hair.

The child remembered that the young man was called older brother, not uncle.

I was quite happy.

Follow your long-haired brother around and sleep in a warm place.

From snacks to rice, and even drinks.

As I eat as much as I want, fear creeps up from deep within my heart as my stomach fills up.

‘What should I do if my uncle doesn’t come?’

‘What if they tell me to go there again?’

‘scared.’

There were kids like that in orphanages too.

I remember the children who left the orphanage with the adults laughing, only to return some time later and just cry in the corner like fools.

When such fears fight against happiness.

I met the light.

“Hey. Are you handsome?”

“Brother. Who is this? The son you’ve been hiding?”

“You can’t talk yet? Are you a baby?”

There was no other reason why I remembered that brother as light.

‘It’s dazzling.’

‘My brother with long hair shined like a fluorescent light.’

‘The old man playing the drums and the old man playing the piano both shined, but not to this extent.’

It was my first time seeing people like that, so I just thought it was like that.

Some people’s bodies even glow… … and so on.

The older brother, who was emitting a strong light like the sun rising in front of her nose, sang a song with her next to him.

And there’s also something called a guitar.

“Tonight―”

As the song started, the lights grew brighter and the older brothers with small lights also started beating drums, playing guitar, and playing the piano.

‘I feel good.’

‘I’m so happy.’

It was just a song, but the child felt a pang of emotion welling up somewhere in his chest.

For the first time since I was born.

The older brother, who had just finished making the sound of an angel, sat down next to the child and laughed while drinking some water.

“Hey, kid. I’m good at singing, right?”

“Oh, right. You still can’t speak? Oh. But you seem to understand something, don’t you?”

“Now that we’re on the subject, I mean, I saw the Live Aid concert the day before yesterday, right? Hey… … This Bohemian Rhapsody is a banned song, so we haven’t been able to hear it in Korea until now? Does that make sense? It was banned until now because it had the name of a communist country in it? Anyway. No matter what anyone says, Queen was the best there. Wow… … The charisma, the charisma… … . It wasn’t just that they communicated with the audience, they were training them.”

“You don’t know what Live Aid is? It’s a concert held in 1985 to help the poor in Ethiopia. Wembley, a really big stadium in London, was packed to the brim… … You just see one place. You just see Queen on stage.”

“… … A third of the world saw it. Ugh… … I think our country also broadcasted it at that time, but I didn’t see it. I found it through the dark path. I have a friend who is incredibly good at finding things like this. His name is Sancho.”

What’s so fun about it?

The brother who radiated light moved his mouth incessantly.

‘Ethiopia?’

‘Live Aid?’

‘Wembley?’

‘One third?’

It was full of stories that I couldn’t understand at all, but I wrote them down in my head as if I was taking dictation.

I don’t know what it was, but the joy and happiness that overflowed like a sneeze was contagious was completely transmitted.

As we were enveloped in this happiness, I felt the darkness in the distance of my memories disappear.

From then on, I didn’t feel afraid every day as I followed my long-haired brother around.

Instead, anticipation and joy filled the void.

“Eh! Oh!”

Here we go again.

He passes the microphone to the child, but he doesn’t respond.

I knew I had to follow along, but I was afraid that if I opened my mouth, people would hate me.

Because I heard what the director said, that people don’t like big kids.

“Hey. Your debut is just around the corner, so why do you keep singing Queen songs instead of ours?”

“Ahehe! Okay, let’s do what we have to do. Hammer to fall!”

Whether they followed or not, my brother, who had been shouting like a spell, smiled at the brothers with small lights and started singing.

Some of those songs were completely incomprehensible, but most of them were somewhat understandable.

Because it was a song written in our language that even children can sing.

“Ssae-aekwi. Eat up. Huh? Then you can grow up quickly and come to the place where hyung performs later.”

“You’re not drinking formula milk yet, are you?”

“Kid. You’re going to be a big star soon, so remember that. Huh? So when you come see my performance later, tell me this. Huh, I’ve grown a lot, right? Do you remember? There’s something like that.”

The people at the orphanage spit out black smoke as they looked at the child.

The adults who occasionally came and looked at the children as if they were choosing items showed a murky color mixed with sadness, anticipation, and worry.

The kind person who brought the child from the orphanage, calling him my brother, was very sad.

It was a gloomy color that held a lot of water.

But this guy is different.

The first adult to treat a child with an absurdly clear and bright light.

‘I’m happy.’

I wanted to say that, but I held back.

‘thank you.’

I wanted to say that too, but I swallowed it again.

I look up at the sky to swallow my words and it’s snowing.

A white light spreads across the dark street.

“Oh, man. You have to wear a seatbelt. It’s dangerous if you get into an accident.”

“You, honey. No matter how much I look at you, you’re handsome. You look like me.”

I grabbed the sleeve of my shining brother who was about to get in front. My long-haired brother said that he was going to meet his real brother soon.

Then it will be hard to see this guy again?

That was the thought.

Very childish.

Thanks to that, I was happy even in the moment that might have been my last.

When there’s light by your side, what could be scary about the cold, the worries, the darkness?

At that moment, I heard a bang.

Almost simultaneously with the sound, light colored the child’s world.

Pain and fear came first, but I think it was my brother who hugged me because I remember the warm and cozy memories more.

The car rolled like that for a while and then finally stopped.

The dazzling light has disappeared.

It was a dark night.

.

.

.

.

.

.

“huh?”

The old spirit who had been immersed in his most original memories straightened his back.

Of course, since I was wearing a seat belt, the tightness of the seat belt was painful.

“Why are you doing that?”

Hong Seon-ah, who was looking at Gu Se-ryeong through the rearview mirror, asked Gu Se-ryeong as if she didn’t quite understand.

“Do memories… change? Or do things you didn’t remember before suddenly come to mind?”

“What do you mean?”

“No… … I just remembered. At that time, Tae-joo oppa was driving. I called him to… … … go.”

“Dongha? Dongha? I don’t quite understand what you’re saying… … .”

“Now that I think about it, the feeling is really similar. Is that why I was more attracted to you?”

Although Hong Seon-ah still gave him a look that said she couldn’t understand, Gu Se-ryeong’s gaze was directed towards Lee Dong-ha’s practice room in the distance.