The World I Was Supporting Was Real - Chapter 17



Episode 17. Luca de Poitiers (4)

“Luca? What’s wrong?”

“Huh? Oh… no. I just suddenly have a headache…”

“Is that so? Are you feeling very unwell? I heard you were deeply engrossed in your studies this morning…”

“Yes… it seems so. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

The nun closed the Bible with a kind smile.

Thump, thump.

Luca could feel something pounding fiercely inside his heart.

Heartbeats…?

“Since it’s the first day of class, it’s okay if you don’t do anything. Ah, it’s just as well. Shall we pray to God today?”

“Ah, yes…!”

Luca closed his eyes and prayed.

“To the one and only God of the world, the great Goddess ■■■■■. Please show mercy today as well…”

The prayer didn’t really register in his ears.

Even the name of the deity was unclear. He definitely heard the sound, but couldn’t comprehend what it was.

Due to the series of strange events happening suddenly, Luca swallowed his dry saliva in tension.

Normally, he would have found the phenomenon strange… but oddly enough, the only phrase from the Bible that was swirling in Luca’s mind felt like it was shining alone.

After the prayer ended.

Luca, who had been hesitating, pointed to the Bible in front of the nun and asked.

“Um… Sister. Is it okay if I take a look at this…?”

“Ah, you mean the Bible. It seems you’re interested because it looks different from the one given to you? This is an item officially issued to nuns.”

As she said, it looked much more ornate than the one Luca had received.

Honestly, that didn’t matter at all. He just wanted to check the contents inside.

He wondered if something different was written in it.

But.

“You are not wrong.”

No matter which page he opened, except for the first page, they were all blank.

Then, what were the words the nun had recited…?

“How is it?”

“Ah, uh… it’s beautiful…!”

Luca couldn’t hide his embarrassment, but the nun, unconcerned, smiled again and took back the Bible.

“One day, you will come to understand, Luca. The true beauty of the Bible comes not from its appearance, but from the content it holds.”

“R-Really…?”

“Of course. Every single word in the Bible is—”

God’s

―God’s word.

Watching

you

“!!!!!!!”

Huh?

What was that?

Just now, I thought I heard a strange voice overlapping with the nun’s voice…?

“Miss? Is something wrong?”

“Huh? Oh… N-No, it’s nothing…”

The nun gently touched Luca’s forehead with a worried expression.

“You seem to have a bit of a fever… I think we should stop here for today. We’ll start memorizing the Bible from next week, so please be prepared by then. The serious theological studies will begin after that. Understood ?”

“Yes…”

* * *

For a few days, Luca showed the Bible she received from the nun to everyone around.

The maids all read the passages the nun mentioned. Without any issue.

Her parents asked if she wanted to become a nun when she grew up, and said they would support whatever she wanted to do. Of course, both of her parents also read the Bible passages without any issue.

Only.

Only I couldn’t read the Bible.

No, I could read it. But― I read something different from everyone else. Only me.

Then one night.

That night, I couldn’t fall asleep.

Luca was never one to fall asleep quickly. Whenever she lay in bed to sleep, it always felt like something was missing.

The feeling of emptiness didn’t go away no matter how much she touched her head or even if her parents were by her side.

Even considering that, tonight it felt especially difficult to meet the sleep demon.

The most dominant feeling Luca was experiencing now— anxiety.

The feeling that she had forgotten something important.

Something… felt like she was forcibly hiding something she had done wrong.

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Unlike the time when she accidentally broke her father’s cherished porcelain as a child, hid it, and cried in her room out of guilt, this time she had forgotten something far more important…

Thump, thump.

Her heart was pounding fiercely.

Something kept shouting at her. She couldn’t hear it, but she felt it.

Luca got up and sat on the bed, relying on the small lantern’s light to check the Bible again.

The content hadn’t changed. You are not wrong.

“You are not wrong…”

The words of the Bible manifested in the world through her lips.

And, strangely enough—just by uttering those words, Luca felt a peculiar sense of power.

‘The word of God…’

Was what was written in the Bible the word of God… um… ■■■■■?

Anyway, if what was written in the Bible was the word of God…

‘Does that mean the words “you are not wrong” are the words of God?’

If so, what does it mean that I am not wrong…?

What does it mean that I am right?

—At that moment.

‘…?’

Through the window she had loved to look out of since she was a child, an incredibly bright moonlight was streaming in.

At the end of the light—was a mirror. The mirror that had always been there.

Luca, as if being controlled by someone, unknowingly walked towards the mirror.

And, finally, when she arrived in front of the mirror.

“…Huh?”

What greeted her was herself.

The mirror reflected an image. Naturally, it could only show her own appearance.

But it wasn’t that kind of story.

Standing there was not Luca, who wore luxurious pajamas and looked like she had been loved and cared for—

But Luca, in shabby clothes, with a painful expression as if she hadn’t eaten properly.

“!!!!!!”

At that moment.

Suddenly, the ground beneath her feet began to shake.

Could it be… an earthquake?

It happened occasionally, but staying calm was difficult for Luca, a 13-year-old child.

“W-What…!! Mom!!! Dad!!!”

Calling out to her parents in panic was brief—

Luca realized that something was fundamentally wrong.

This isn’t the ground shaking.

It’s the walls.

Everything except the ground she was standing on… was melting.

The wallpaper. The dolls. The warm bed. The diligently written diary, everything.

“W-What is this?! Help me! Help me!”

She cried out in fear, but soon, the space turned dark.

The only thing left in front of Luca’s eyes was a mirror.

And the unhappy self within it.

Before she could even comprehend what was happening—

‘That voice’ began to be heard.

＜＜＜Luca.＞＞＞

“!!!!”

From above… a voice was heard.

Someone from above…is watching me?

“Wh-Who are you…?”

＜＜＜I am an agent of God. Calm down. There’s no need to be afraid.＞＞＞

—Nod, nod.

All Luca could do was move her head stiffly—

‘D-Don’t be afraid…!’

I must be brave. Dad said so. Courage is the virtue above all…

Luca, lifting her head, barely squeezed out the strength in her heart and spoke.

“If you are an agent of God… are you an agent of ■■■■■?!”

＜＜＜No.＞＞＞

—That is not the name of God.

＜＜＜Luca. If you’ve read the Bible, you would know.＞＞＞

‘… … !’

＜＜＜The ‘Word of God’ that no one else can discern, you could see it. Because you are loved by God.＞＞＞

Me, loved by God… … ?

＜＜＜Hearing this voice now is in the same context. God desires your happiness.＞＞＞

“God…… desires my happiness?”

＜＜＜Yes. That is why we created this place― an idyllic false paradise where you, as Luca de Poitiers, can be loved by everyone and only experience happiness.＞＞＞

Because God’s will is your happiness.

“What……?”

Luca froze, his eyes wide open.

Wait a minute.

What do you mean by creating an idyllic false paradise… … ?

The world I’m in… … is fake?

Instead of answering, God’s representative continued with what had to be said.

＜＜＜You must be wondering why this is the path to your happiness. It’s a very simple story. You are―＞＞＞

―Fated to never be happy, no matter what.

* * *

I want Luca to be happy—that is God’s will.

The strong will of the true One God who looks down upon us.

With the “omnipotent power” bestowed by God, we search and search for every possibility for Luca to be happy.

But it was impossible. It was like trying to resurrect someone who had ascended to heaven after fulfilling their life.

However, ‘God’s will’ must be fulfilled no matter what. Therefore, the answer derived by the world―

―Promised eternal happiness in the model garden.

A happy place without pain or sorrow.

A loving father, a wise mother, and maidens like sisters. A place where no sad events ever occur.

That was the only way for Luca to be ‘happy’.

“So, what you’re saying is……”

… … It’s all fake?

My mom, my dad, all of them?

The family I loved… … were all, all just illusions?

Luca sank to the ground.

It was clearly an absurd story, but strangely, he could be sure of it.

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The being speaking to him now, the agent of God, was not lying.

＜＜＜That is why I have come to you.＞＞＞

“Yes…?”

＜＜＜Luca. You are a child loved by God. It is very rare for God to use such immense power. That is how much God values ​​your ‘will’.＞＞＞

It’s simple. If you want, I will send you back to the ‘real world’. To that place where you cannot escape a harsh fate.

Of course, if you wish to stay in this world—at least your soul will be able to rest in eternal happiness, knowing nothing.

“That means-“

＜＜＜Yes. It is your decision. What will you do?＞＞＞

Luca bowed his head and thought of an answer.

Naturally, he thought of going back. To the place where his parents were waiting.

If this was a dream, he thought he would cling to them, crying and wanting to sleep together.

But.

But, something kept.

The words “You are not wrong”.

The thought that he was forgetting something kept coming back.

Luca slowly stroked his head.

…No, this isn’t it.

I was forgetting something.

Would I know if I went back to the original world?

But… is that important?

‘…Yes.’

Yes. This is a terrible nightmare.

When I wake up, I will tell Mom. That I had a dream where an agent of God appeared.

Mom wasn’t that religious, so she would worry while wondering what kind of dream I had this time. Luca really liked the warmth of his mom.

Dad was the same. Always worrying about me.

Even in difficult situations, he always gave me his food, always saying, ‘God is watching’—

‘…Huh?’

Drip, drip.

Suddenly, tears like chicken droppings fall to the floor.

… … Dad?

To me… … to me… …

Always, that God is watching.

That He is watching all the choices I make… … Dad used to say.

Luca couldn’t find the words to properly explain her feelings right now.

How could a 13-year-old girl explain that she feels such a longing, even though she doesn’t know who she longs for?

＜＜＜Make your choice freely, Luca. God will not judge you.＞＞＞

“…….”

Luca looked at another reflection of herself in the mirror, then quietly closed her eyes.

Then she combed her hair again.

Miss, you used to say. Every time I combed your hair, you would say, ‘This doesn’t seem right,’ or ‘It feels like something is missing.’ I thought maybe you felt empty with your long hair, so I got this for you. How is it?

I… …

Everything in the Bible, every single word, is God’s word.

If what’s in the Bible is truly God’s word―

Luca slowly stood up and stared directly at the darkness above her head.

“……I want to go back to the original world.”

―I must not be wrong.